Ingenious Parents Figure out How to Get Their Kids Back in School — Babylon Bee Style

AP Photo/Jeff Chiu

So here we are. Little more than two months into the “Biden-Harris” presidency. Between Nancy Pelosi, Chuck Schumer, and Biden’s handlers, America is being “transformed” in a way that makes President “Hope and Change” look like a piker. Nowhere is the transformation more evident — exactly as intended — than in the Biden Border Crisis™.


Biden has all but ordered the placement of northbound-only people movers all along the U.S.-Mexico border, hired mariachi bands, and set up “free money” ATM machines to welcome wave after wave of — as Joe calls them — “irregular migrants” into the country.

Then it got even worse — in a way so preposterous it’s hilarious in its hypocrisy.

As we reported yesterday, San Diego Mayor Todd Gloria on Sunday announced that the influx of illegal immigrant kids into his city would be housed, fed, and educated at the San Diego Convention Center — by in-person teachers.

And as we reported earlier today, White House Press Secretary Jen Circle-Back Psaki immediately broke into her circle-back kabuki dance when asked to explain why illegal-alien children are receiving in-person learning before American kids.

Fox News contributor Tammy Bruce was among many ticked-off people who fired up their Twitter machines to share their outrage. Fox News reported that more than 700 unaccompanied migrant children are being housed at the convention center.


“San Diego teachers given option to teach migrant kids in-person instead of Americans ~~ ‘Our teachers have been asked if they’re interested in working at the convention center site, as opposed to the worksites they are assigned to.'”

Liberal Twilight Zone, gang. As is the case with young women now forced to compete against biological males in sporting events, America’s school kids are now being passed over in favor of illegal migrant kids who wouldn’t be here if Biden hadn’t spent his entire pandering presidential campaign eagerly inviting illegals to “come on over, it’ll be great!”

Needless to say, this inexcusable farce — “normal and perfectly acceptable” by Biden standards — has drawn the ire of not only rational, desperate parents of school-age children across the nation but also every other rational person in America as well.

So, as the saying goes, desperation breeds ingenuity; what on earth do American parents of American school kids have to do to get their kids back into in-person learning?

Welp, as “reported” by The Babylon Bee — the best satire site in the known universe, IMHO — ingenious parents have begun to dress their kids as illegal-alien kids so they can finally see the inside of a classroom again.


According to The Bee, “one parent” reiterated her previous instructions to her young son as she dropped him off near the Mexican border in Chula Vista, California.

“OK, Aiden, remember — if they ask you what your name is, just say, ‘No hablo ingles.’ And don’t pick at your fake mustache; it’ll fall off. Don’t forget your poncho!”

Parents experiencing their first taste of freedom in over a year — knowing that their little loved ones are finally going to receive in-person instruction again — were elated, as they sped away from the border in their minivans.

Although, as “reported” by The Bee, the kids will have to sleep in steel cages with foil blankets — just for now, of course — but to a parent, they all said it was well worth it.


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