Sometimes you see something on social media that just has to be satire. It has to be. And then you click on it. And then you see that the Hill, the Free Beacon, and the Washington Examiner have written about it. And you see Steve Sebelius tweeting incessantly about it.
And the creeping, horrific realization that the Mitch McTurtle Twitter account and mascot are real hits you like Michelangelo’s nunchucks. Apologies to anyone over fifty for that confusing reference.
That’s right — the Nevada Democrats are fighting a campaign against Senator Dean Heller (R-Nev.) with promises of good jobs and financial stability…no, wait. They’ve created a mascot inspired by Senator Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.), playing upon his oft noted turtle-like appearance.
Finally, the Democrats are taking American politics as seriously as a presidential Twitter account! We can rest assured, knowing that Top Minds have our greatest concerns at the forefront of their agendas.
Here is an actual Twitter picture of the turtle mascot holding a cartoonish bag of money at a Nevada Dems campaign event.
Here is another picture of Nevada Democratic Party Chairman William McCurdy not even pretending to be mortified by this experience.
The catch phrase linking all of this together is…are you ready for this epic word play? “Shelling out millions for Dean Heller since 2011.”
Okay, take a deep breath. I know we’ll never see a pun like that again in our life times, and you need a moment to recover.
Are you good? Alright, let me explain how this mascot is particularly horrible messaging in Nevada, and in Clark County especially.
My brother has Down Syndrome, and when our family lived in Las Vegas, he attended Helen J. Stewart school. It is a place where kids with special learning needs receive a comprehensive education to help them at their own developmental level. Their mascot is the Mighty Turtle.
Additionally, Nevada has been working tirelessly to preserve the endangered desert tortoise for as long as I can remember. No, tortoises are not turtles, but it’s almost like the Nevada Dems who came up with this utterly brilliant scheme to shame Mitch McConnell with his own appearance (which, don’t forget, somehow also makes Dean Heller look bad) have absolutely no idea what regular Nevada residents care about.
There is already a guy in a desert tortoise costume walking around Nevada trying to preserve wildlife. There is already a feisty turtle in Las Vegas trying to inspire beautiful young people to participate as fully as possible in their communities.
And now Nevada Democrats want to use a turtle in a negative political campaign? Dudes, do you even live in Nevada?