Neo-Nazi Furries Are a Thing and We Must Unite To Stop Them

There are times that we, as a nation of white and black, Left and Right, Republican and Democrat, must come together to stand opposed to cultural movements that are just bad for society. Now, one has arisen that we must come together to destroy.

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Oddly enough, it has come from within the alt-right. Who could have foreseen that the end of western civilization would come from within resurgent nazism?

Ladies and gentlemen: We are now seeing the rise of neo-Nazi furries.

Newsweek (trigger warning: it’s Newsweek) has done an in-depth report on this new subculture, and it’s terrifying. If you are unaware of what a “Furry” is, imagine a millennial dressing up as an anthropomorphic animal and participating in social situations (including sexual ones) as that animal.

I don’t blame you for leaving this story now. It’s only going to get worse.

Still here? Okay.

So, take that horrifying idea and consider young, alt-right neo-Nazis into the mix. I am sorry that you have to be introduced to this world, but I know you will survive. Anyway, here’s Newsweek’s reporting:

Junius, a horse in his early 20s, is handing out stickers at a Hilton DoubleTree in suburban Philadelphia. It’s August, a week after the deadly white supremacist rally in Charlottesville, Virginia, that roiled the country, and he’s set up a booth that has attracted an assortment of animals—from fennec foxes to Munchkin cats—all waiting in line for his merch.

Junius isn’t actually an equine. And his customers walk on two legs. They’re all furries, people who identify with—and often dress up like—their favorite animals, a fantasy that may include various forms of sex but not bestiality. These hirsute hobbyists are in town for Furrydelphia, the area’s first convention for furries. Many are queer and very left-wing, so it’s no surprise that the stickers—a swastika inside a paw print with a red slash through it—hold special appeal.

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Yep. We’re doing this. Hold on tight, folks.

But when it comes to the alt-right, the furries are definitely passing judgment. Just ask a goat named Dionysius, who announced his arrival in Philadelphia with a cryptic post on Gab, a social media site for people banned from Twitter. “Made it to Philly, funny how a fifth of Jack Daniels makes the drive go faster. Always happy to meet new friends who hate commies like I do.” He knew he’d have to do most of that meeting outside the convention because he—and some of his friends—were banned from it for threatening furries. Before the convention, he spent $105 to commission artwork of his “fursona,” or furry alter ego, throwing Junius and two other furries out of a helicopter—a nod to a right-wing meme about how an Argentine junta killed dissidents during the 1970s.

Let’s stop here to catch our breaths. This is a lot to take in.

So, we’ve got a dude who likes to dress up like a horse being threatened by a guy who dresses up as a goat. The goat person paid one hundred and fifty dollars to have a cartoon of his online furry persona (his fursona, if you will) throwing the horse person out of a helicopter. Goat dude, according to Newsweek, also likes wearing Nazi armbands.

If you don’t believe mankind is a fallen creation of the Lord and needs to seek redemption, you’re not paying attention. Anyway, back to the action.

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Dionysius thinks his banishment was an overreaction—and one typical of what he calls “social justice warriors.”

Of course he does.

He says he commissioned the artwork in response to left-wing furries threatening to punch “Nazi furs” (they didn’t actually punch them).

Did we need that parenthetical aside?

“I would like to note that punching someone is an action that can be done very easily at a furry convention,” he says. “No one has ever brought a helicopter to any furry convention that I know of. I chose that setting, as well as the cartoony style, precisely because I did not want to make it a threat.”

Fantastic defense. “I can’t get a helicopter to a furry convention, but someone can punch me, so clearly my being banned was an overreaction.”

The alt-furries believe their group is misunderstood. Len Gilbert, a prominent alt-furry, says they are not Nazis, and most of the members are not white supremacists or national socialists either. Gilbert’s name is a pseudonym, one he used to pen a furry erotic novel, The Furred Reich, about a young Nazi officer’s encounter with an anthropomorphic female snow leopard.

I want to die.

He keeps his fursona a secret to allow him to attend furry conventions without getting banned, punched in the face or both.

First of all, I am pretty confident that furryism(?) is a mental disorder. I can’t prove it yet, but there are some fetishes that are just too odd to occur in a sound mind.

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Second, every subculture has its subcultures, and the alt-furry subculture is one of the worst things I have ever heard of. I didn’t even believe it was a real thing at first, and I am someone who has come across virtually every Internet subculture at some point in my life (I hate Tumblr so very, very much).

They must be stopped. No matter what.

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