VIDEO: There Is Such Thing As Too Much Love For A McRib

For years, I have been asking one question: What is the McRib made of? It is delicious, sure, but whatever animal McDonald’s makes it from must be endangered, because it only comes around every once in a while. Perhaps McDonald’s has the last few animals it comes from, and every year, they breed them for slaughter.

The McRib is a delight. I enjoy McRib season. However, I don’t love it so much that I would petition a city council to bring it to their constituents.

This girl does, though.

I have no idea why this video is even circulating again. It’s more than a year old. However, it’s currently all over Facebook for reasons that escape me. I mean, it’s not as bad as the fact that “Pubic Hair” was trending the other day, and I thank the Good Lord for the two stories not being related.

Still, this kind of video makes one think about life. Do you have anyone who loves you as much as this girl loves the McRib? No. No you don’t. And that’s okay. Humanity was never meant to love a sandwich this way. It’s unnatural. My biggest concern is that this will go to the Supreme Court, where this girl will force America to accept sandwich marriage.

Merry Christmas, you guys. This world is messed up beyond all belief.