Tuesday Cartoon: Keith Olbermann 'Dates' Dolls...

 

On Monday, Keith Olbermann, the former MSNBC “newsy” anchor and current leftist nutbag, went on Twitter and said that he dated Kyrsten Sinema, claiming that she was even more left than Keith himself. I’m dubious.

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Maybe she was more “progressive” 10 years ago, but I’m not buying that Olbermann and Sinema “dated” or that she was more left than frothing-at-the-mouth leftist Keith Olbermann.

When Olbermann isn’t living in his bathtub he’s consistently unhinged and likely makes stuff up. The funniest SNL bit in decades was Ben Affleck’s parody of Olbermann because it’s spot on. Does anyone think Keith’s “dates” last past the first and only date? I don’t. If he and Sinema went “out” it ended after dinner. Maybe she swore off men for a while after her “date” with Keith.

The more likely scenario? Keith acts out the way he would like a relationship to go. With Dolls. Imagine the following:

Keith would dress his favorite Ken and Barbie and go on a “date.”

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Ken doll plays Keith and Barbie plays his latest love interest. Ten years ago, it was Sinema

Keith would dress in his best suit and play with his dolls.

Keith: Kyrsten — our first date didn’t go quite as I planned. I apologize for my spittle falling into your wine.

Barbie (aka Kyrsten): Oh, Keith, don’t worry about that, I know how passionate you get when you talk politics. You were so gracious for ordering a second wine for me.

Keith: I get heated when I think of George Bush, and when the waiter said his name was George I was triggered.

Kyrsten: Oh, I understand. Bush is the worstest human ever. In the history of the planet. Like, ever. The worst. You were so right to obsess over him for eight straight years.

Keith: Thank you, Kyrsten. You seem to understand how I, alone, changed history.

Kyrsten: I do Keith.

Olbermann moves his dolls in for a plastic kiss…

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