The Internet Demands the Armpit Hair of Social Justice for Imaginary Super Warrior Princess With Magic Lasso

While most people were obsessing over the Republicans making a hash of the Obamacare repeal, others were focused on more consequential matters, namely Wonder Woman’s armpit hair.


There’s a scene in the latest trailer for the upcoming movie that shows Wonder Woman with her arms raised above her head, revealing smoothly shaven pits. For some people this is a problem.

No, not THAT Joe Cunningham. (I believe he said he prefers a Wonder Woman with sideburns and a soul patch.)

Speaking of suspending disbelief, I think it’s important to note, that in the scene where Wonder Woman’s armpits are on full display, she is lifting a tank.

This is exactly my point. Thank you. She also stops bullets and has a magic lasso that compels people to tell the truth. Wrap anyone in that lasso and they will say, “She looks better without armpit hair,” even if they are currently making a public stink about its absence.


Why is everyone focused on just her armpits? If armpit hair would make her more authentic then what about her legs, her arms, her eyebrows? If you’re only going to demand hairy pits for social justice you’re a poser. Demand that she be sasquatched up from her unibrow all the way down to her hobbit feet. If she does not resemble Chaka from Land of the Lost, the patriarchy has won.


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