Good morning friends. We are apparently not at war in Libya. No, it is no war. Despite shots being fired, Marines being sent, and tomahawks launched, it is not a war. It’s not even a battle. Nor is it a fight.
According to the Barack Obama Administration, it is a ‘kinetic military action’, which best I can figure is some sort of cure for some sort of bad rash, or something like that and it may or may not involved a Microsoft Xbox attachment. Given the mission is named Odyssey Dawn, which sounds like a Las Vegas Stripper, a ‘kinetic military action’ could also be some sort of shot across the bow of rare venereal diseases too.
But it is definitely, positively, absolutely not a war. If it were a war, Barack Obama would have to get pre-authorization from Congress or Joe Biden would support his impeachment.
Friends, this is a kinetic cluster SNAFU is what it is. Our intelligence community says Al Qaeda is not helping the rebels, just as they said Iran was not going to pursue a nuclear weapons program any time soon and missed out on the whole U.S.S. Cole and Embassy bombing thing — not to mention September 11, 2001.
As our intelligence community was issuing proclamations that Al Qaeda is not involved, Al Qaeda itself is sending videotaped love missives to the rebels telling them to keep up the fight against Khaddafi or however the hell you spell the man’s name. Allegedly, Al Qaeda also said Odyssey Dawn is the name of one of the 77 virgins waiting for the rebels.
Oh, and if it couldn’t get any better, the Libyan rebels have taken to chopping up “black Africans” into little pieces or putting bullets in their heads. Why? Well, it appears K/Ghadaffi hired sub-saharan mercenaries and instead of trying to decide who is who, the rebels are killing every dark skinned African they can get their machetes on.
Germany bailed, by the way. France and Sarkow are passing the buck to Barry.
Wake me when it’s over.