The idea of toxic masculinity has drummed up some pretty ridiculous conclusions from the social justice and identitarian left, even going so far as to make it seem like even the most basic things men do out to be the result of villainous intent.
Some men buy into this lie so much that at least one group of men has gotten together to form a cuddle group, according to the Philly based The Inquirer.
Calling itself the “Men’s Therapeutic Cuddle Group,” these six guys get together to help heal their past traumas and find new ways to express themselves that aren’t toxic. These men apparently come from different backgrounds and consist of different sexualities, such as a 37-year-old Mormon and a 57-year-old married father of three.
“So often, we’re taught that to be an emotional stoic is the mark of manhood,” said Scott Turner, a 46-year-old interior designer and co-founder of the group according to The Inquirer. “If you show any emotional weakness or vulnerability, that’s a failure to your title of a man.”
He added that “if we expect men to be emotionally sensitive to the needs of others, they first need to be able to build an emotional vocabulary.”
If you’re wondering how their meetings go, The Inquirer was allowed to sit in on one such occasion:
At the beginning of the session, everyone agreed not to engage in sexual touch and to ask for consent before each action. They gathered in a huddle and breathed meditatively.
The cuddling started with men pairing up to do “the motorcycle hold,” in which one man sits with his back against another man’s chest, as if they were riding together on a motorcycle. Some massaged their partner’s shoulders or hands, while others stroked the other person’s beard. Many closed their eyes as the room fell into silence. After 15 minutes, they switched to a new partner.
For the second half of the session, the men cuddled as one large group in what they call a “puppy pile.” Men lay with their heads in each other’s laps, chatted, and joked.
It would appear that the concept of “toxic masculinity,” which has been a relatively recent concept cooked up by radical feminists and social justice advocates, is now driving men to solve the problem by being more like women.
There’s nothing wrong with being open about your emotions, and indeed, there’s less of a taboo about expressing your emotions to your male friends than mainstream thought lets on. However, the oddity comes from the fact that what we’re seeing here seems more like an excuse to scratch an itch. These men, at least some of them, have wives and children with which cuddling is pretty much a standard.
I find it odd that these men feel the need to keep prolonged physical contact with one another in order to heal and not their significant others. Regardless, cuddling with your support group of men won’t solve the scars you have. Cuddling may relieve certain stresses and make you feel safe, but it will not erase the scars.
Most importantly, it won’t erase one’s “toxic masculinity.” For one it’s a fantasy concept to begin with. There may be hurt men who hurt people, but to place that solely on the fact that they’re male is wrong to do. As a society, we never call it “toxic masculinity” when a female teacher uses a minor for emotional and sexual gratification.
I don’t know these men, and if they want to cuddle with each other and call it therapy then more power to them. However, I’m willing to bet there’s more going on there. They’ve either bought into the idea that behaving as women do will cure them of the ills society says they have, or perhaps they have a desire to be closer with men then they think.