Breaking: Rosie O'Donnell Has Apparently Been Given Authority by God to Condemn People to Hell, Starts With Paul Ryan

Rosie O'Donnell attends the Broadway opening night of "Hamilton" at the Richard Rodgers Theatre on Thursday, Aug. 6, 2015, in New York. (Photo by Charles Sykes/Invision/AP)

Rosie O’Donnell, the same woman who recently told Ben Shapiro to suck her d*ck, and openly attempted to bribe Republicans to vote how she wanted them to, is now telling House Speaker Paul Ryan that due to the passage of the tax bill, he’s going to be a permanent resident in the everlasting fiery pit.


Angry over the fact that Republicans scored a major victory, leftists attacked Ryan for his holiday message celebrating the birth of Christ. Posting a video on Twitter of he and a Montana student lighting the Christmas tree in DC, Ryan wrote “at the end of each year, no matter how short—or long—it may feel, there is always Christmas. Waiting for us is that sense of wonder the shepherds felt when the angels appeared in the night sky to herald the birth of a Savior.”

This was then commented on by anti-gun group Mom’s Demand leader, and firearm ignoramus, Shannon Watts who attempted to misrepresent Jesus into a political tool with which to beat Ryan over the head.

“Jesus was a brown-skinned Middle Eastern undocumented immigrant,” wrote Watts. “He condemned the greedy and commanded us to serve the needy without condition. He was murdered by conspiracists who preached the rule of a police state over compassionate humanity. Noodle that on .”

Watts did not elaborate on how stripping everyone of their gun rights is not police state advocacy, or how blocking anyone who presents her with an argument against her points — including yours truly — is “compassionate humanity,” but as per the usual, we’re all sure she knows exactly what she’s talking about.

Watt’s tweet was caught by O’Donnell, because of course it was, and O’Donnell decided to throw her own two-cents in on Ryan’s message, because of course she has to.

Rosie told Ryan that for passing tax cuts, he was going straight to Hell. She called him a “fake alter boy” and even compared him to Judas, the guy who betrayed Jesus.


Like Watts, Rosie did not elaborate on her points. Specifically how allowing people to keep more of their own money, instead of being forced to render more unto Caesar is somehow the path to eternal damnation. Like many leftists, Rosie may believe that being forced to pay more taxes is the same as voluntarily giving up money to charity to help the needy. I can assure her it’s not.

But what do I know? Rosie may be a biblical scholar, and in her wisdom can accurately predict Ryan’s end. Or perhaps Rosie has a direct line to God, and knows for certain that Ryan is condemned to burn forever because she and the big guy talked about it. Or perhaps she herself has been given authority to condemn people to eternal suffering for the sin of displeasing her with wrong-think.

If that’s the case, I’ll see you all in Hell.


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