Based on Its Contents, The Green New Deal May Have Been Written With a Pink Pen, and Glitter

 

There is no way this can be taken seriously by anyone who is serious.

Washington and the media have been all aflutter with the release of the sweeping policy proposal that is being trumpeted as The Green New Deal. That this “Deal” is actually a binder full of government mandates is only the beginning of the farce. That it was penned by political neophyte and walking punchline Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez means it gets tossed into the circular file and you then go to wash off the glitter and feathers glued to the cover.

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How is it that anyone is taking serious the sweeping proposals of a 28-year-old incoming freshman House member, and one who has shown her grasp of basic governance is a challenge? Recall it was just years ago that the perpetually brilliant Barack Obama was going to transform our energy industry to a green entity? It led to tens of billions paid out to dozens of companies which went bankrupt. It led to no national rail system, and no fleet of electric vehicles at the White House as he promised. It led to Donald Trump raving in the SOTU how we now lead the world in oil and gas production and are export-positive in those commodities.

But Alex the barista from the Bronx has all the answers! The biggest challenge in the analysis of this unicorn fairy tale is where to begin. It is so rife with disqualifying policy proposals that the mind struggles to home in on a starting point. That the writer herself cannot even keep her basic comments straight and managed to contradict herself within a day is a testament to this being a fantasy.

AOC sat in with NPR’s Steve Inskeep and in discussing just the basic overview you get problems. Inskeep asked her pointedly, “Are you prepared to put on that table that, ‘Yes actually they’re right, what this requires is massive government intervention?” Alex barely hesitated. “It does, it does, yeah, I have no problem saying that.” Except – later the same day she did have a problem saying it.

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As she sat with Chuck Todd the idea of the Feds stepping in to enforce her plan – as she proudly declared – was now an offensive charge. “I think one way that the right does try to mischaracterize, uh, what we’re doing as though it’s, like, some kind of massive government takeover.” So, she cannot wait to have the government takeover and run everything, and anyone who suggests she cannot wait to do this is lying!

This is not going well, and it has only been out one day.

There is zero doubt – running everything is exactly the proposal here. Consider the underlying concept is to transform our energy usage, retrofit every building in the country, restructure our entire economy, and completely eliminate major sectors of our society due to energy offensiveness. That will require a consummate governmental takeover. Now consider she expects all of this to take place within 10 years — that will require someone from Gryffindor wielding a wand.

These are the same financial wizards, mind you, who are currently telling us that building a border fence is an economic impossibility. But eliminating industries and creating completely new forms of energy production inside of a decade are completely serious proposals. Except those are not even being taken seriously by proponents.

Members of the press are just giddy over this plan, and the fact that a governmental proposal is rife with impossibilities seems not to matter at all. Politico writes in its lengthy supportive defense of the GND, “The Green New Deal will never happen the way it’s laid out — and that’s kind of the point.” In summation, they’ll ask for the stars but settle for the moon.

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Just don’t analyze too closely this proposal they declare is so serious. Because that is the best way to underscore how unimpeachable the facts are in such a broad plan — don’t think critically about it! I mean look, she states clearly that her all-encompassing rail system will cover the nation “at a scale where air travel stops becoming necessary.” See? Problem solved! Your asking how exactly anyone will make it to Europe or Asia is merely hateful focus on needless detail.

As Dave Weigel at the Washington Post tried to play defense on behalf of the Deal, he showed that much of the media support was not predicated on actually reading the Deal. He mocked anyone, for instance, who dared suggest AOC wants to eliminate airplane travel.

What he failed to note is that the words in the Deal actually affirm the desire to eliminate airplane travel. Huh.

 

Weigel’s response to this reality; you are not supposed to take these entries literally. In a policy proposal. In an official document submitted meant to transform legislation, we are not supposed to read the words placed on paper and take them literally.

Good to know, because there are plenty of other fantasy passages throughout this Deal. Kimberly Strassel listed many other details that provide sources of humor, not societal transformations. Proposed renewable energy facilities and fields would occupy a land mass greater than the size of California. It actually calls for retrofitting or tearing down “every building” in the nation, private AND commercial.

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For some reason, this energy proposal from Alexandria also mandates that wages be controlled by the government and that government healthcare for all be implemented — in a plan she is insulted by us suggesting involves a government takeover. What those items have to do with energy mandates is a mystery, and don’t you dare ask why!

And when it comes to funding all of these fantastical new policies, do not fret at all. AOC has that neatly figured out. The Federal Reserve will simply extend credit for all of this needed work. Also, she declares “New public banks can be created to extend credit too”. Banks will be created out of whole cloth, to dole out money that does not exist. How could any of this go wrong?!

But there is a guarantee this WILL be successful. So much money will exist that they promise “economic security for all who are unable or unwilling to work.” Read that again…slowly. Economic security is promised to all UNWILLING to work. This calls a question immediately to mind, Ms. Ocasio-Cortez: If you are paying people unwilling to actually work who in the HELL is going to build all of this grandiose infrastructure you have dreamed up??? That “I don’t wanna” sector will make labor tougher to come by, just noting.

This Green New Deal is such a sophomoric package, put together in a way that Ben Shapiro accurately compared to a toddler’s crayon scribbling on the walls, that there really can only be two benefits to come out of it. It allows us to completely disregard going forward any journalists who are supporting it, and it provides political ammunition for any candidates running against the politicians who have signed on to this “plan”.

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** for more entertainment, political, or bad movie content follow me on Twitter @MartiniShark

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