I regret to inform you that the left has come up with a new hoax, and this one centers on Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth. Multiple "journalists," including Matt Yglesias, took to social media to either insinuate or outright claim that Hegseth was boozing it up during a recent presser in Europe. What is their evidence, you might be asking? We'll get to that.

As to the backstory here, if you followed Hegseth's nomination process, you'll probably recall that the press used anonymous sources to accuse him of being an alcoholic. In the aftermath, several of his colleagues from Fox News as well as his time leading a veteran's advocacy group debunked the notion, and nothing has been presented to date to back up the accusations. But as with all things regarding the mainstream press, the goal was simply to plant the narrative, truth be damned. 

ALSO SEE: Pete Hegseth Gets Rude and Disrespectful Welcome By US Military Command in Germany

Returning to the supposed "evidence" that Hegseth was sipping whiskey during a press conference, here's Ygelisas' post. 

I assume this is a trick of the light and he’s not actually throwing back bourbon on camera, but it’s interesting that the water looks brown. pic.twitter.com/M8vpj7FpLt

— Matthew Yglesias (@mattyglesias) February 15, 2025

Likewise, Heidi N. Moore, who has written for The Wall Street Journal and The Guardian, pushed the same line, except without the faux nod towards ambiguity. (Editor's Note: This tweet appears to have been deleted post-publication, but you can still see what it said):

Woo boy. Hegseth already keeping bourbon in the lectern. pic.twitter.com/VPuZfJjnv7

— Heidi N. Moore (@moorehn) February 15, 2025

I'd like to not have to spend my time debunking ridiculous conspiracy theories, but the mainstream press is such total garbage that I'm left with no choice. Let's have a little science lesson, shall we? 

You see, water is translucent. It is also reflective and magnifying. That means that when a person picks up a glass of water, whatever is on the backside of the glass will show through and be exaggerated. In this case, Hegseth's hand. What is seen in the video is not "bourbon." It's simply the guy's skin showing through the glass of water. How do I know? Because I'm not a complete moron. 

Ladies and gentlemen, your intellectual betters in the media. https://t.co/Wt6UPeD04F pic.twitter.com/ad1e8OMdOW

— Bonchie (@bonchieredstate) February 15, 2025

Remember, though, that these are your self-proclaimed intellectual betters who can be trusted to judge the "qualifications" of government officials such as Hegseth. They don't understand how water works, but by golly, they are experts when it comes to the running of the bureaucratic state and a variety of other issues. 

It's been said before but not enough: Most in the journalistic class are underachieving imbeciles. I don't say that to be mean. I say that as a statement of reality. These are not smart people. Many of them are nepo babies who went to various high-browed journalism schools where indoctrination, not common sense reigns supreme. Long story short, no, Hegseth was not drinking alcohol on the international stage, but maybe he should have been given the people he has to deal with.

Editor's Note: This article was updated to note that Hegseth is Secretary of Defense, not State. We regret the error.