Rhino Poacher Is Killed By an Elephant and Then Eaten By Lions, His Pants Are OK Though

Sometimes you need a break from politics and this seems like a good place to start.

A man out trying to poach rhinos in South Africa was trampled by an elephant and then eaten by a pride of lions last week. Yes, this really happened.

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South African authorities say they have recovered the remains of a suspected rhinoceros poacher who was believed to have been killed by an elephant before his body was devoured by lions.

The victim’s family say they were informed of his death by fellow members of a poaching gang that entered Kruger National Park in northeastern South Africa on Tuesday, South African National Parks said in a release.

Authorities arrested four other poaches involved with the deceased man who told them where to look for the body. What they found was something a little less complete.

The man’s remains were found on Thursday — but not before a pride of lions got to them.

“Indications found at the scene suggested that a pride of lions had devoured the remains, leaving only a human skull and a pair of pants,” park authorities said.

In other news, this guy was apparently in possession of the world’s greatest pair of pants. Seriously, whoever made them needs to be filming a commercial right now touting that they are even tough enough to survive being eaten by lions.

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Kruger National Parks officials warned of people illegally entering the park.

“Entering Kruger National Park illegally and on foot is not wise, it holds many dangers and this incident is evidence of that,” said the park’s managing executive Glenn Phillips.

I’d say that’s good advice.

Moral of the story? Don’t try to poach rhinos or you may end up stomped to death by an elephant and eaten by lions. Sorry, I just needed to type that out one more time.

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