Cool Kennedy Nails Mob Monster Mentality With a Metaphor of the Zombie Apocalypse Kind

Brandon Keller, of San Diego, poses as a zombie from the television series "The Walking Dead" as he waits in line for Preview Night of the 2018 Comic-Con International at the San Diego Convention Center, Wednesday, July 18, 2018, in San Diego. (Photo by Chris Pizzello/Invision/AP)

 

If lovin’ Kennedy is wrong, I don’t wanna be right.

I’m talking, of course, not of JFK but Lisa Kennedy — a woman who’s made the surely-exhausting trek from MTV VJ to Fox News host.

She’s smart, she’s stylish, she’s got things to say.

And on Friday, the girl served up the goods with quite the metaphor amid our current Zombie Apocalypse.

During a segment of Outnumbered, she told host Harris Faulkner that mayors who caved to the mob were starting to learn a lesson you and I already knew — if you capitulate to an unfocused violent mass of millennial mayhem, guess what you get more of?

Rather than being satiated by a win, K explained, rioters had developed a “taste” for power.

Starting off, Harris pointed out that mayors such as New York’s Bill de Blasio, Portland’s Ted Wheeler, and Chicago’s Lori Lightfoot — all of whom had appeared to appease rioters — were still being pummeled by those hangry hordes.

She asked:

“What are we supposed to make of that?”

Cool Kennedy schooled the studio with some symbolism of the sci-fi sort:

“It’s like a zombie who gets his first taste of brains. He doesn’t go, ‘Yeah, that was pretty good. You know what? I’m going to go back to vegan.’ No. You know what they want? They want more brains. You give them one statue, they want 15 statues.”

How have select politicians missed this?

Kennedy used Mayor Lori and her decision to take down two statues of Christopher Columbus as an example:

“She capitulates to the mob. What’s next? They have a taste for it, they know how to push her buttons. Her city is falling apart.”

It’s a basic principle of life — if you feed the monster, the monster will grow.

Perhaps Lori and Bill and Ted should’ve watched Little Shop of Horrors — “Feed me, Seymour!”

Or how about the Gremlins? Don’t let them eat past midnight.

via GIPHY

via GIPHY

Blockbuster was once full of lessons which could’ve prevented our present problem.

But a zombie movie will do as well as any.

Kennedy’s dead-on: A bunch of young people stood in the face of police and screamed. And spit. And the police did nothing. So they continued. And the police did nothing. They burned things and tore down things. And the police did nothing. They took over parts of cities. And the police did nothing. Guess what’s next?

To be clear, I’m not referring to the protestors grieving over police brutality. Nor am I talking about black protestors standing for black lives.

I’m talking about, so far as I can tell, people screaming for a revolution but having no attainable — or even explainable — goal in sight.

Honestly, it’s so vague, I don’t even know what I’m talking about. But whoever they are, one thing is certain — if they floss, they’ll be picking out pieces of parietal lobe.

And the unrest will continue, until the brain buffet is closed.

-ALEX

 

See more pieces from me:

2020 is Bogus, But the New Trailer for ‘Bill and Ted Face the Music’ Looks Excellent

Near-Naked Nurse Goes From COVID Caretaker to Telling Russians How Hot It’s Gonna Be

#Throwback Thursday: A Robber’s Master Plan Leaves Him Trapped in a Phone Store ‘Til the Cops Come Calling

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