Well ... DID Ted Cruz's Dad Help Kill JFK? Or Even Something WORSE?

ted-cruz-dadDonald Trump really wants to know. Just keep in mind, he’s merely asking questions. Just simple innocent questions about what Ted Cruz’s dad had to do with the assassination of an American President. That’s all. See, nobody has explained this picture that the National Enquirer has and someone should explain it, because of booing and unity. But I think the bigger question is, what can be done about this obvious cover-up?

First, the facts. Here’s what we know:

1) Ted Cruz has a dad. Note the gender specificity. These fake culture wars are a distraction.
2) Ted Cruz’s gross “male” “dad” has been in photographs. They use light to record images. Images of people’s faces.
3) John F. Kennedy had a face. ON HIS HEAD. THE HEAD WHERE HE WAS SHOT.

These are not merely questions that need to be answered. You must understand that by raising these issues, we are necessarily implicating him in a conspiracy. We are tying him to it. We are saying “look, the face thing! And remember the part about gender??”

And that’s not even the worst. Think about THIS:

I suggest that you get Reince Priebus to investigate these very serious allegations from Donald Trump, who is bound and determined to tie Ted Cruz’s family to the JFK assassination. And he is, after all the very real and actual GOP nominee for President. That’s your guy now, Republicans. Take him as he is and at his word.

So take his suggestion of conspiracy as seriously as you take the man himself, Reince. And while you’re at it …

… get him to answer that one, too. It’s what his official and for real actual GOP nominee thinks. Take it as seriously as you expect us to take him as a candidate, Mr. Chairman.