You Won't Believe What Former Speaker Denny Hastert Is Doing Now

I’m not sure when this stopped being tragedy and started being a farce, but I’m real sure we’ve reached that point.

If you recall, back in May 2015, former House Speaker Denny Hastert was indicted by a federal grand jury for lying to FBI agents about certain suspicious withdrawals of money from his bank account. As it turns out, Hastert was paying hush money to a what is to all appearances a blackmailer, a man who Hastert had “inappropriately touched” while Hastert was a high school wrestling coach and the blackmailer was 14 years-old. Subsequently, Hastert was sentenced to 15-months in Club Fed. The story should have ended there. But no. That’s not how stuff works these days in the era-of-no-shame.

The apparent blackmailer sued Hastert

The accuser at the center of the Dennis Hastert hush-money case sued the former House Speaker on Monday, saying he never finished paying $3.5 million in cash to settle a sexual abuse allegation.

The man known only as Individual A had only pocketed $1.7 million from the politician when the FBI began investigating red-flag cash withdrawals and learned of their secret deal.

Now, two days before Hastert is to be sentenced for illegal financial transactions, Individual A has filed suit in Illinois state court, seeking to collect the $1.8 million balance.

Well, Denny Hastert is nothing if not a fighter — or a child molester… one of those things:

Imprisoned former U.S. House Speaker Dennis Hastert has asked a Kendall County judge to not only reject a sexual abuse victim’s breach-of-contract lawsuit, but also to make the man pay back $1.7 million in secret hush-money payments.

In response to the lawsuit and in his counterclaim, made public Thursday and signed by Hastert, he denied that the oral pact is akin to a valid and enforceable contract and, if so, it would be the plaintiff who breached it when he broke his silence and spoke to federal authorities.

You have to admit there is a certain elegance and logic in his lawsuit. I’m don’t know if both these guys can lose, but I’m buying popcorn.