Diary

Frankendodd, or Splitting the Evil Mind from the Beast

They really are very different, you know.

Just look.

Barney Frank is a criminal, cold and calculating. To the extent that destroying the Constitution and replacing it with a system of government more to his liking is a crime (you can look up it up, USC Title 18, Chapter 115), then all the other crimes, heists and flimflams, while maybe harder to prove, are still mere lesser- included offenses of the primary crime.

Frank should be seen in this manner, instead of, as we often do, as just one of many offending members of the Democrat Party…or a Socialist who rides sidesaddle. This has been to Barney’s advantage, as both comic relief and a member of a club where its members are indistinguishable from one another. We should pursue Barney Frank like Holmes would Moriarty, as a singular, and singularly able criminal. He is. Indeed, our side has a few able Sherlocks out here, and the great Barnett would find it troubling indeed were he to learn that he had fallen under the microscope of such a super sleuth. In fact, the sooner we proclaim it the sooner he will feel the heat of the glass, for as he already knows, the brides of socialism have a tougher time in stir than ordinary stand-up (sic) criminals.

Chris Dodd, on the other hand, is no such great mind. He is a craven opportunist. Imagine George Costanza going into a candy store in Queens to find the cash register drawer open, and the owner laying on the floor behind the counter, gasping for breath from an apparent heart attack. Like George, Dodd ‘s first instinct would be to look around to see if anyone is looking, then clean out the cash drawer and move on down the street. Let someone else call 911. Hey, he’s already made sandwiches out of women…live women. This is not out of character.

Dodd-like people you don’t waste the brain power of a Holmes, or even a Guiliani, to bring to justice. You just send Vinnie and Augie over with baseball bats to maim a little, making sure the left forearm is left 45 degrees out of kilter and the right knee cap…but hey, I’m day-dreaming, since all that stuff is illegal, and we can’t suggest those kinds of things here…

…even though unlawful doesn’t always mean wrong.

For Dodd, the fear that a reckoning is lurking alone could kill him…the fear of dark alleys, dark rooms. Remember, I’ve always said, “Make them afraid”…each according to his own demons. Dodd’ll have to carry a flashlight everywhere after he retires. No matter, we will catch him and convict him. His side can’t win and ours will, and his will be one of the first show trials. And then he will become the Sweetheart of Cell block Chi…”and the moonlight beams on the boy of my dreams…”

Spare the rod and spoil the Congress.

So both of these halves of the monster raise different temperatures in me. I would pursue each according to his temperament and his innermost fears. Forget politics. Barney fears the Sherlock who has singled him out, the great mind who wants to match his, but also says “This is for all the marbles”, and who begins dogging him in all those subtle, hinting ways only Sherlock Holmes could do. Dodd, on the hand, fears everything, especially not knowing if there is really a place he can run and hide. Or a place he can drop his soap in peace (sic).

I’m no Sherlock, but Dodd is mine.