It's dark in here and I can't get anything clean

I was at Wally World yesterday and thought I would add to my stash of incandescent light bulbs (I prefer GE Reveal bulbs). All I could find were 100 watt bulbs that I don’t need. I gave a few seconds thought to pitching the Holy Mother of Fits in the middle of the store, but because it’s not WalMart’s fault our government has decided what kind of light bulb I can use, I went about my business. To buy dishwasher detergent that doesn’t get my dishes clean and laundry soap that doesn’t get my clothes very clean unless I run each load twice. I got in my truck to go home, being thankful it is winter and there’s no need to use the AC in either the truck or the house. I’m fearful of running out of freon. My truck and my home air conditioning unit are both from 2002 and both use the ‘old’ freon. When my AC unit at home had to be replaced in 2002, no one told me it was on the verge of being obsolete and after a few years (2008?), I’d not be able to have it charged with freon, nor would there be any kind of ‘adapter’ to allow the new kind of freon to work. By the time I got home, I had to make a dash for the bathroom where, when I pushed the handle, I hoped that this time all the TP would go away with just one flush. While watching, I again indulged in my favorite bathroom fantasy of having a commercial toilet like the ones we have at work. You know what I mean, the ones that flush so forcefully they could probably suck a small child into the sewage system. And, they actually clean the bowl with the force of the water while it flushes. I’ve spent a lot of time trying to figure out how I can secretly get one of those installed in my home.

I’ve tried the CFL light bulbs. They suck. They don’t last as long as advertised. They don’t come on immediately when you flip the switch. I don’t know about you, but if I’ve been out later than planned and forgot to leave a light on, well I’ll just be waiting out on the porch until the stupid CFLs decide to put forth light. There is nothing natural about that light. As an artist, this is particularly worrisome as I depend on having decent light to work under when the sun is not available. Case in point – the walls in my house are painted a bluish gray which turned the most sickly color of green in the rooms where I installed those bulbs. I immediately removed them and replaced with a few incandescents from my quickly dwindling stash. I threw the CFLs in the trash (insert evil laugh here). Yes, I know I should have properly disposed of them by taking them to some recycling center that’s never open normal human hours, but I just didn’t want to. Now the only CFL I have is in my porch light and it works quite well out there. I put it in over a year ago and it still hasn’t burned out, even with leaving it on from dark until dawn.

I think I’ll go to Home Depot and buy some kind of light fixture that actually uses 100 watt bulbs and then I can stock up on those. That’ll show ’em. Yeah.