Diary

Groundhog Murderer DeBlasio Named PETA Person of the Year

Yes, you read that correctly.  New York city mayor Bill DeBlasio has just been named person of the year by People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals.  PETA granted this honor because, according to the New York Daily News,

Mayor de Blasio’s mission to corral the city’s horse-carriage industry has helped him score the title of Person of the Year from advocacy group People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. 

PETA … also hailed de Blasio for overseeing the barring of the elephant and tiger acts in Bronx performances by the UniverSoul Circus.

How quickly they forget.  Mayor DeBlasio murdered Charlotte the groundhog.   (For public relations reasons, Charlotte was operating under the nôm de rodent of “Staten Island Chuck” that day.)  On February 2, 2014, the following sequence occurred:

DeBlasio Murders Charlotte
DeBlasio Murders Charlotte

Despite an attempt to cover up this horrendous crime, the New York Post reported the story in full.  Poor Charlotte hung on for an entire week before passing away due to severe internal injuries.  Groundhogs everywhere emerged from their burrows to write an open letter to hizzoner.  The editors at The New Yorker were brave enough to publish it.  Excerpt:

We, the Groundhogs of New York City, demand that you, the Mayor of New York City, stop holding us up in the air on Groundhog Day. We shall not stand for it anymore.

Ever since the courageous first rebellion of Charlton G. Hogg the Brave (known to you simply as Chuck), who bit Mayor Bloomberg’s not-so-iron fist in 2009, a movement has been gaining steam to abolish the cruel tradition of Groundhog Day. We intend to continue this struggle, in solidarity with our fallen brothers and sisters.

Will PETA reverse this disastrous decision?  It smacks of discrimination in favor of larger mammals and against those who are naturally closer to the earth.