Obama’s Plan for Economic Recovery: Shooting Craps

NOTE: Keep in mind – THIS IS SATIRE (read my introduction post for background)


Obama’s Plan for Economic Recovery: Shooting Craps


Reports from Washington are that part of the President’s V5.0 economic recovery package being worked out between golf outings in Vineyard Haven, MA center around a scheme plan to have the government bankroll promote job growth through an acquisition takeover of mortgage giants Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac.  The fantasies proposals entail the taxpayer US Government now officially adding to its portfolio of investments entering the Insurance, Automotive, School & Home Loan, Credit Rating and real estate market by holding and leasing foreclosed homes in addition to refinancing those primarily responsible for the previous collapse high risk and sub-prime mortgage borrowers.


“It almost seems to me you want to have some type of announcement or policy, program or something from the federal government that provides that clear signal that we are here supporting the housing market and this is indeed a good time to really consider buying.” ~ Frank E. Nothaft, Chief Economist at Freddie Mac (Note: this is a real quote)

When asked about the recent experiences with gambling that economic policy, Mr. Nothaft responded “Well, the problem before is that the ponzis programs before were prematurely exposed terminated during the final months of the Bush Administration as a result of an inordinate lack of confidence in under performing assets.  I am sure that had the market not experienced such a violent turn that these schemes affordable housing policies would have been paid for by the taxpayers sustained for a much longer period.

The Obama Administration has publicly remained will leak more later quiet on this subject, however; sources inside the Administration believe this is a winner for them – both politically and economically.  “After all, Republicans really can’t say much about it since they are the ones that gave us the additional $2.5 trillion to spend agreed under the framework of the cave bipartisan debt limit agreement.  Secondly, what we want to show people is that we care with other people’s money. And sometimes when you really care, you have to spend money borrowed from China.  This will however be a win-win though for the special interests American people.  Soon everyone, regardless of race, ethnicity, religion, sexual orientation, national origin, size of political contribution to the President’s re-election campaign political affiliation,or inability to pay economic status can afford once again to be given buy a taxpayer subsidized home.”

Senator Jim DeMInt (R-SC) responded “Once again this Administration has shown its absolute disregard for economic reality and the people’s message in the November elections.  Instead of managing taxpayer money wisely righting the ship of state, it seems the folks up there would rather fundamentally change America keep heading for the iceberg.”