NOTE: Keep in mind – THIS IS SATIRE 🙂
(read my introduction post for background)
The presidential ambitions of seven Republican candidates
passed into the great beyond faded at approximately 1 PM EST today. Texas Governor Rick Perry, in Charleston SC for the RedState conference solemnly preceded his remarks by asking for a moment of silence for each political ambition ended that day. “Let us all take a moment to pause and reflect on the loss of Obama Clone, Obama Light, Running Man, It’s My Turn, What’s His Name, Purple Rain & Ethanol Boy each campaign’s dreams.” After which Perry and the conference attendees observed 7 minutes of silence The Governor then read a brief statement:
“This is indeed a sad day. We have lost 7 wonderful candidacies and no one is more
inspiredshaken or elatedsaddened than I. I cannot imagine the loss the establishmenttheir benefactors and contributors must feel at this moment. My thoughts and prayers are with the candidates as they strive to find jobs in this challenging economic environment.
President-elect Perry ended his victory speech remarks by declaring “I will continue, along with others like MB & SP the fight these candidates so nobly began and will I not stop until President Obama is able to continue vacationing on his own dime find pursuits that stop him from further destroying the American Dream fulfill him in his post-presidential retirement. Thank You. God bless the United States.”
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