I just got my "Republican Senatorial Committee" survey

Boy, do I feel important.  Ole’ Orrin Hatch sent me a National Republican Senatorial Committe survey today (I should feel proud, as it stated that I was one of 500 select republicans in my town to receive it).  Alas, after reading it, I felt compelled to compose this response, rather than fill that dang thing out. . .

    Dear Senator Hatch (or whichever minion reads this response),You want my response to your poll? As a lifelong Republican (although, right now, I cringe at that characteristic of myself, as I am first and foremost, a conservative), I find your poll laughable. You want answers to the questions you present (while preening for dollars to support you re-election bids so that you can cozy up with Democrats that seem hell-bent on destroying our country)?

    OK, here are mine. . .

    Ballot Question 1: Which issue(s) do you believe Republicans should highlight in this year’s policy debates?

    Answer: All of them, you freaking idiots! We, as conservatives, stand for everything you have listed. And you want to “poll” which one or the other is most important? You truly are clueless. No wonder we keep losing.

    Ballot Question 2: Which of the Democrats’ liberal policies do you oppose the most?

    Answer: All of them, you freaking idiots! Why do you need to poll me on which one is more important? Are not you elected as a “conservative Republican” to represent us?  Never mind, rhetorical question.

    Ballot Question 3: Tax cuts passed in 2001 and 2003 have helped cut the federal deficit in half, and have helped create more than 7 million jobs. Republicans in the U.S. Senate want to make these tax cuts permanent. Senate Democrats oppose permanent tax relief and think taxes should go up so that Barack Obama can “spread the wealth around. Whom do you support?

    Answer: Gee, you folks up there are clueless. First off, those tax cuts could, and might have, cut the deficit in half, had not you idiots jumped on the spending bandwagon (hey, what is a half-billion between friends, after all, right?). Taxes need to be reduced to levels that are appropriate for our government to operate and not one penny more. It is our money, that is, me and my fellow Americans, that you so covet for your pet-projects. If you had a spine, you would have fought hard against this supposed “Stimulus” bill that, when you get down to it, would have better served every tax-paying American by giving them $20K to spend us out of this recession.

    Instead, you folks up there are taking focus group questions, wondering why “Joe the Plumber” asked his question that elicited the response “spreading the wealth around” that you have so carelessly usurped for your poll, and the truth is, if you just looked at it, you would understand why. No wonder we (conservatives) have no voice.  You campaign as conservative Republicans, but govern as free-spending Democrats.

    Ballot Question 4: Senate Republicans support responsible judges who will follow the U.S. Constitution, and NOT legislate from the bench. Senate Democrats wat to confirm “activist judges” who will . . . blah blah blah.

    Answer: Where were you during the fight for President Bush’s appointees? The Gang of 14 seemed to foreclose upon exactly what you ask about. Where were conservatives then (oh, forgot, now they need money for re-election. . .my bad)?

    Ballot Question 5: What do you believe are the most effective ways for Republicans to counter the Democrats’ attacks against our policies, and reach the most voters with the facts about our Republican Agenda?

    Answer: Radio, TV, the Internet, all of them. The problem you have is that most conservatives have a hard time with you all right now because you are not acting conservative, as you were elected to do. The best message to the American people is to stand up and fight President Obama, in your jobs in the Senate and House, because that will garner more attention (just see the House vote on the Stimulus Porkulus bill). We do not what our country to fail, we just whant this slide into socialism to fail.

    Ballot Question 6: <snipped>. . .Will you help the NRSC fight for our Republican agenda and the candidates who support it?

    Answer: Not on your life, not now. Your agenda is “get money to keep me up here,” not to support the ideals that I, and many fellow conservatives I am sure, have. When congressional Republicans take a stroll down to the local Billiard store, and buy yourselves a set of balls to remind you that we are a conservative country at heart, and that you folks need to show yours at times, then I might contribute. Until then, thanks for the opportunity to take your poll.

    Roger Mitchell