Diary

The Greatest Headline Of All Time

First, I’d just like to point out that I’m kind of a media wonk — I specialize in media bias.  Second, I greatly enjoy sarcastic humor; especially when applied to government.  The Onion is one of my favorite publications.

This headline is not from the Onion.

In a Savings Shocker, the Government Discovers That Paper Has Two Sides
Front-and-Back Copies, Other Wonders Help Agencies Save $102 Million — .006% of Deficit

Sweartadog.  This is the headline of a Wall Street Journal column by Jonathan Weisman.  Apparently, the President told his cabinet to tighten their belts a bit.  Among the methods used by the agencies are some head-scratching ‘wonder-why-they-weren’t-already-doing-that’ common sense items:

  • DoJ printing on both sides of their paper
  • The Forestry Service will no longer paint all their vehicles green upon buying them
  • The U.S. Navy (I’m the son of a Navy Chief, so I don’t wanna hear it) will delete unused email accounts
  • The USDA will no longer send so many representatives to the National Cooperative Association Meeting…in Hawaii.

Now, not to pick on the totally, completely, fish-in-a-barrel issue, but…this is the government that wants to decide if and when you are treated for, say, brain tumors.

Laugh, but be afraid.  Be very afraid.