Rangel and Obama

NEW YORK – Rep. Charles Rangel has shot back at President Obama’s recent comment that he “end his career with dignity.”

Speaking at a candidate’s forum in Harlem Monday night, Rangel said the president hasn’t “been around long enough to determine what my dignity is.”  When advised of the congressman’s retort, President Obama drew back, placed his hands on his hips and said, “Oh no he di’ n’t.”  He added, “Haven’t been around long enough?  I been around long enough to know that Old Spice doesn’t cover up Colt 45, which is more than I can say for that old silverback. He smell like a walking yeast infection.”

Still in Harlem, congressman Rangel received a tweet of the president’s remarks from an aid and said, “Oh snap.  It on, now.  Yeah I been around a long time, I been around a long time like Obama mamma.” When the aid whispered in his ear that the president’s mother was dead he paused for a moment, but shrugged and said,  “Not my fault he don’t take care o’ his wimmin.  And have you seen that wife o his lately? She getting chunky these days.  She keep eatin’ cake, she gonna need her own zip code.”

The president, who received word of the congressman’s remarks on his ever-present blackberry, struggled to respond.  After fruitlessly consulting the blank teleprompter he said, “That Charlie a chip off the old block.  He ugly just like his momma.  She so ugly she gotta back into a room to keep the furniture from running away.”

To which the congressman quipped, “Back into a room? At least my momma didn’t go ‘beep beep beep’ when she back up like Michelle do.”

Journalists asked White House spokesman Robert Gibbs about the exchange, but he claimed he was unaware there had been any unpleasantness.  When presented with a transcript of the jibes, he gesticulated broadly and said, “Yo, ain’t no disprespect in two homeboys doin’ the dozens.”

The Reverend Jesse Jackson, when apprised of Gibbs’ remarks, said that “homeboy” was a racist term when used by a white man, and that it was doubly racist when used by one as white and pudgy as Robert Gibbs.  He demanded an immediate apology, as well as a significant donation to the RJJFPSORED (Reverend Jesse Jackson Fund for the Purpose of Stamping Out Racism And Enriching the Downtrodden.)


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