GOP Debate Questions

Liberal moderators of recent GOP debates have gone to great lengths to keep the candidates attacking each other and steer the discussion away from uncomfortable topics like the economy, the budget and the debt ceiling. George Snuffleupagus, Diane Sawyer, John King and Brian Williams have set the bar pretty high, so Wolf Blitzer will have to get very creative at the CNN debate in Jacksonville. Here are some questions Wolf can use to keep the focus off of Obama:

  1. Do you think any of your opponents were beat up on the playground as a child? If so, why?
  2. Newt said beet sugar is more important than cane sugar. Why would he say that? Which type of sugar do you think is more important?
  3. Does Mitt Romney use the same hair gel as Jon Edwards? If so, should that disqualify him?
  4. Where do you stand on contraception in gay households in states that don’t permit gay marriage?
  5. If we can solve the problem of illegal aliens by relying on them to do self-deportation, can we also cut police department staffing and rely on self-arresting criminals?
  6. Terri Schiavo died 7 years ago, but I don’t think Brian Williams fully explored the issue in the last debate. Do you think her parents had more right to make her medical decisions than her husband?
  7. When Jeb Bush was Governor of Florida, he frequently held press conferences in both English and Spanish. Should we be conducting this debate in Spanish?
  8. If elected President, would you have Margaritas in the White House served with or without salt?
  9. Is it culturally sensitive for FSU to have the Seminole as their mascot?
  10. Mitt—you hired undocumented workers as gardeners. Should all gardeners in Florida be subjected to self-deportation?
  11. The University of North Florida doesn’t have a football team. Is that fair?
  12. There is a famous photo of an alligator and an anaconda that got in a fight in the Everglades. Should the photographer who took the photo lose his health insurance for trespassing on federal property?
  13. Should dependent children of undocumented workers be allowed to vote without showing ID?
  14. Should Che Guevarra have been self-deported?
  15. Boxers or briefs?