Diary

Taking the Miller Analogies Test with Brilliant Liberal “Journalists.”

Perhaps we can now disclose who writes David Letterman’s rape jokes about the Palin family. Perhaps it’s none other than Matt Yglesias. Filth in the name of character assassination follows below…

Ahmadinejad is in most ways a classic right-winger, a demagogic nationalist and cultural conservative. In a manner somewhat reminiscent of a Sarah Palin, however, he clothes this right-wing politics in a language of class resentment, painting his more pragmatic and reformist opponents as decadent elites out of touch with ordinary people.

Yglesias then goes on to explain why he’d be pulling for Ahmadinejad is some fictional future GOP Primary.

Unlike the populists of the American right, however, he merges this rhetoric with something resembling an actual populist economic agenda. The main element has been the use of oil revenue to expand the state sector of the economy in an attempt to distribute wealth more broadly throughout the country. This approach has gained Ahmadinejad a loyal following among the rural poor and public employees, but Iran’s objective economic performance has been disappointing, even during the great oil boom years.

Of course Andrew Sullivan, of The Atlantic, did this cute, little dance first. His despicable comparison between Ahmadinejad and Karl Rove follows below.

“Ahmadinejad’s bag of tricks is eerily like that of Karl Rove – the constant use of fear, the exploitation of religion, the demonization of liberals, the deployment of Potemkin symbolism like Sarah Palin.”

“Think of this regime as Cheney and Rove in a police state setting, and you see what’s been going on. ”

Let’s see….

Wipe Israel off the map…check.
Supports legal code that’s fine with honor killings….check.
Sent intelligence agents to train the Khybar Towers Bombers…check.

Yep, I see the light! Ahmadinejad is exactly like Palin, Cheney and Rove. (Where are those gosh-darn html sarcasm tags when they’re needed?)

Like Sullivan and Yglesias, I did OK on the analogy part of the SAT as well. In honor of these bile-infused, reality-challenged, troladytic eggheads, I propose a couple of analogies as well. Here goes….

Timothy Geithner’s views of how law applies to the wealthy and powerful in modern society remind me eerily of Mrs. Leona Helmsley’s. Like “The Queen of Mean,” he thinks of paying taxes owed to the IRS as a menial task. People like him and Timothy Daschle are charged with more important things to do and can’t be bothered.

But unlike Leona, he had to give some mealy-mouthed excuse for his non-payments. Openly admitting that he believed taxes were for the little people would have engendered too great a cognitive dissonance for him not to get his yuppie butt fired.

And then there’s always this splendid target of opportunity….

Al Gore’s offset-trading firm reminds the casual observer of Bernie Madoff’s investment schemes. Like Madoff, Gore sells a poorly detailed financial product that offers no tangible value to the world. Like Madoff, the pricing of his offset shares are based on utter fantasy.

However, unlike Madoff, Al Gore will never face justice for the millions that his “eco-friendly” business empire has bilked from the gullible masses by trading in information that is verifiably wrong.

So there you have it. Outside of the fact that both Leona Helmsley and Bernie Madoff got mongo jail time for their efforts, they make great analogies to our current Sec Treas. and one of our former Veeps. Although I doubt this is where either Sullivan or Yglesias wanted this whole cute game of analogies to continue.

Tune in two years hence, when I reference the US inflation rate and claim that proves Barack Obama and Robert Mugabe really share lots of things in common. Enjoy the day!