Parasites and Slurpee's

After spending an entire weekend paying bills, installing a new washer and dryer, washing cars and in general, completing chores around the house, I decided to treat myself to a Slurpee from 7-11. After all, I work Monday through Friday, earn a decent paycheck, make productive use of my weekends and darn it, I deserve a Slurpee! What a mistake such a simple decision would turn into!

Standing next to me at the Slurpee machine was a Hispanic woman no older than 20 who looked every bit of the 9 months pregnant that she no doubt was. While waiting for her to finish topping off her extra-extra large Slurpee’s (note that Slurpee’s is plural), I take notice that her left ring finger is lacking a certain piece of jewelry but no big deal; I am, after all, in a low-income side of town and children having children out of wedlock is not exactly an uncommon occurrence. Sadly, it’s not even shocking anymore!

Once I was finished filling up my medium-sized Slurpee cup with all its artificial cherry goodness, I made my way to the cashier and, as circumstances would have it, the 20-something young woman was standing just ahead of me finalizing her purchase. It was THIS moment that ruined my entire day; THIS moment that completely killed the fantastic mood that I was in, after completing an entire weekend’s worth of chores; THIS moment that, as Ron White would say, “spun me into a dimension of pissed off that I have never been in before in my entire life!”. This, dare I say it, WOMAN reaches into her overly-stretched-near-the-point-of-breaking spandex pants and pulls out her Electronic Benefits Transfer (EBT) card! This, this, THIS leach on society DARES to walk into a 7-11, buy two massive Slurpee’s, and then pay for it using her FOOD-STAMP CARD!

In the interest of preserving my energy for more useful activities, such as WORKING, I decided to not say anything to her and allow her to leave the store without so much as an iota of humiliation. But my mood was set, and I decided to look a bit more into the food-stamp card program because, not only has this irresponsible sloth elevated my blood pressure to heart-attack levels, it was only last year that the Los Angeles Times broke a story about EBT cards being used at casinos across the country and well, now, my interest is peeked. Surely, a parasite cannot legally purchase a Slurpee using MY money, can she?

According to California’s EBT Project website, Slurpee’s are not exempt from the program. In fact, any junk food is permissible including soda, cookies, and ice cream. Additionally, parasitic participants may use their benefits at any restaurant that participates in the program including, Jack-In-The-Box, McDonald’s, and any other number of fast food liberal-targets (note the irony that liberals make a frequent target out of fast food joints, even blaming them for childhood obesity, yet will not ban the use of EBT cards at such establishments). To make matters worst, purchases are not tracked thus allowing the sloths to continue using their cards without any oversight of HOW they are being used!

In the words of the media’s Messiah, “the time for change has come!” No longer should I, or any other hard-working taxpayer, be subjected to such gross inflictions of offensive acts, such as the one that I was witness to. California needs to begin tracking what, specifically, is being purchased by welfare recipients so that they can properly trim down the program to include only those items which are prudent and necessary. Certainly, we can all agree that fast food joints and, for that matter, any other restaurant should not be permissible, can’t we? After all, what have these people done to deserve a night out on the town? Hell, if it wasn’t for the Los Angeles Times (and I rarely ever give them much credit for ANYTHING), these yahoos would still be spending their days at casinos! And, as if you weren’t gagging already, illegal aliens are not exempt!

Quite frankly, so long as the government continues forcing their hand into MY cookie jar, at the very least, they should have a responsibility to ensure that the program is only being used to put nutritious meals onto the tables of the parasitic-class.

That’s my two cents….