Bibi to the Rescue


At first glance, it might seem surprising that a bunch of guys who loathe the military as much as Obama and his playpen pals do, are so obsessed with looking tough. But if you put it in perspective,it begins to make sense. Do you recall how those Choom Gang guys used to hang around the flag pole out in front of the high school, as far away as possible from the jocks who liked to beat them up?

That’s why the stoners always moved in a pack, because it made them look tough, and as every high school kid knows, if you can’t be tough, the next best thing is looking tough. Furthermore, if you can’t be tough around the tough guys, at least you can be tough around the nerds. Most of the time, striking a pose is fine. If you’re an insignificant night clerk at the local Seven-Eleven, looking tough might even dissuade some punk from robbing you. Of course, if he does go ahead and pull that gun, within seconds you’ll be lying in a pool of your own urine, sobbing and begging him not to kill you. But, like I said, that’s fine.

However, if you happen to be president of what used to be known as the most powerful country on earth, striking poses can come back and bite you. This is what Obama has yet to learn. You can’t go around mouthing tough guy phrases and striking poses that impress your stoner buddies. Because in the real world there are guys like Putin who like to show off their pecs and wrestle bears and alligators. They see you in your mom jeans cracking wise about consequences and costs, red lines and knocking chips off your shoulder, and they just laugh.

Which is what has just happened in Ukraine. Leave all the geopolitical mumbo-jumbo aside. Forget about Crimea basically being Russia, and only falling under Ukrainian jurisdiction for the past sixty years or so. Or whether the current Ukrainian government is more or less corrupt than the previous one. None of that matters. The only thing that matters is that the United States has become a joke.

The day after Obama warned Putin there would be costs if he sent troops into Ukraine, he procured permission from his rubber stamp parliament to do just that. And to recall the Russian Ambassador as well. It would have been better to have said nothing than to make more empty threats. This person currently Occupying the White House has adopted a foreign policy the exact opposite of Teddy Roosevelt’s. And it doesn’t work.

Luckily for our hapless leader, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu chose that moment to visit the White House. It was very kind of him to sit down for a photo op, and to keep his mouth shut while the President threatened him with boycotts and international isolation if he doesn’t do exactly what Obama wants him to. Must be nice to know we’ve still got some allies, otherwise who would we be able to push around?

Choom Gang foreign policy would be a joke if it weren’t so disastrous for America’s future, and by extension, that of the world. Many people have resented the American Century, and  they have chafed under our clumsy leadership. We’ll have to wait to see how much more enjoyable it will be living in a world divided neatly between Russia and China. We’ll see what good soft power achieves when wielded against thugs and bullies.

At the end of the day we will have to learn how to live in a world in which we are mocked by our enemies feared only by our allies.