Barrack Obama has an energy plan, sort of, for America. He plans on immediately discontinuing the use of fossil fuels and then replace said fossil fuels with…………………?????????? Apparently a VIABLE, inexpensive alternative hasn’t been invented yet soooooooo we all just have to sit in the cold and dark of winter, or suffer heat stroke in the summer until the technology becomes available.
It gets better. The EPA in its quest to stem ALL pollutants from our air, water, and planet in general, will not allow you to burn ANY substance for fuel. No wood, paper, manure of any kind, no peet, no organic fuel of ANY kind! So you’ll just have to suck it up and be dark and cold until the future catches up with you. The punishment for violating any of the EPA regulations is to be sent to Washington D.C. where you have to listen to Cass Sunstein lecture Congress on regulations…….all 890 gazillion pages of them!
The government does reserve the right to allow the elitist classes to use fossil fuels while they search for the alternative answer to their energy agenda. They are wise, you are not! The EPA has decreed that they will allow us “little people” to gather around hot springs, “geo-thermal geysers, and active volcanoes as a source of heat. Volcanoes will only be allowed to be used until such time as they can be harnessed for the exclusive use of the “RULING CLASS”!
The environmentalists will not allow ANY animals to be used for food or harmed in any way so therefore government nut gathering seminars will be conducted regularly. Edible Mushroom, nut, berry, and plant courses will also be taught. Warming your food with sunlight, boiling in hot springs, or roasting near active volcanoes will also be conducted.
Since no detergents will be allowed it will become necessary to learn which lakes, ponds, streams and rivers are acceptable (and safe) to bathe in. We wouldn’t want our children to become sturgeon bait now would we? Fishing is strictly prohibited until such time as a painless fishing technique can be developed.
No bird eggs of any kind may be consumed as they are living creatures. If you are really that hungry….eat you children until such time as the ruling class decides WHEN you become a human being. Under Obama’s EPA ALL animals EXCEPT human beings are a protected species en masse!
There will also be a class given (free of course as the ruling class will have taken all your money) to show you which plants you can safely use as toilet paper. I’m sure that Sheryl Crow and her friends will thank you especially if you use only ONE leaf to wipe!
Just a piece of advice….since trees will no longer be used for ANYTHING anymore just be acutely aware of where they will fall when they get too old. Wouldn’t want to see killer trees develop now would we? Yes….a new regulation! Cass, oh Cass………