For John McCain to win, the GOP better "grow a set."

**For a guy who was going to refuse to stoop to negative campaigning, Obama doesn’t mind stumping from the gutter. Make no mistake about it, he KNOWS what’s going out on the air. He endorsed that low-class ad about John’s Cancer.

These wussy retorts the GOP is putting out are a waste of money. So, as a public service, I’m going to write the GOP’s ads for them. Noooooo, not really. But if I were writing the ads, here they are:

  1. “The Obama Nation? No, it’s pronounced A-bom-i-nation. The people who show up at national conventions with molotov cocktails. The people who refuse to stand for the National Anthem. Basketball players who mock the Anthem with profanity. High School kids who refuse to stand for our Anthem. High School teachers who are afraid their students might dare to think for themselves.”

  2. “Barack Obama wants to be your President, but he can’t be your mailman. The U.S. Post Office doesn’t want mail carriers who stop along their routes for a quick snort of cocanine.” The American people don’t want a man who obeys drug laws at his convenience. Barack tries very hard to water this down by calling it a mistake. He was a grown man, making a DECISISON to use drugs. Do you want him making decisions for you?”

3. “No reasonable person is suggesting that we should forget slavery because it ended 150 years ago. But the Democrats want you to forget that only 40 years ago, Barack Obama’s friend, Bill Avery, was blowing up public buildings with regard for property, or the men, women, and children that were in those buildings.”

  1. “Michelle Obama got such a kick out of the country believing Obama’s “lipstick slip,” she couldn’t resist doing one herself. “Don’t vote for her because she’s cute.” [Obama-patented pause for laughter] “And I’m talking about me.” Sure you were, Michelled. Sure you were. And Barack had no idea the DVDs sold in the church lobby said the U.S. Government unleashed AIDS on the black man. The Obama Campaign. A string of pathological lying.”

  2. “Barack Obama put it in a book. He wanted everyone to know, early in the campaign, to know. Early in the campaign, when 5% of the population even knew who the candidates were. As a public service, now that everyone in America is tuned into the campaign, wanted to remind the 95% of you who don’t know, that your candidate Obama was a cocaine user when he chose what laws he would follow, and which laws for beneath him.”

  3. “Why is Barack Obama so slick at to constantly refer to Bill Avery as “One of the thousands of people he KNOWS.” Why does Barack Obama go to such extraordinary and clever lengths in interviews, to avoid telling the American public that he has, on numerous occasions, called Bill Avery, a FRIEND?”

  4. “Why did the Democrats have such a fit when John McCain wanted to table his campaign to fix the economy crisis? Because they knew that after the rhetoric, Barack Obama would fumble his way through ACTING on the problem. They knew Obama would sit around and whine while John McCain was taking control.”

  5. “Please say the following sentence: “If Barack Obama was not half-black, he still would have beaten Hillary Clinton for the Democratic nomination for President.” Now say it without laughing. Try it without biting your tongue. Think about the worst thing that ever happened to you, then see if you can say it without giggling.”

  6. “When John McCain was a Navy fighter pilot, Barack Obama was still having trouble staying inside the lines with his crayons. He had rug burns on his knees, and creamed corn on his bib. And he had the same respect for John McCain then as he did when he approved the ad highlighting John McCain’s Cancer. Which, like every other enemy he faced, John McCain beat.”

  7. “Remember when the President of the United States was the ultimate role model? When he FOUGHT, not BOUGHT, the drugs that were destroying America. He didn’t participate by buying and using them. He didn’t throw his friends under the bus when they were no longer any use to him in his career. He didn’t silence his Pastor with a promise of funneling more money after the election.”

  8. “Have you been lying to your children? Have you been lying to your friends? Do you tell your friends you worry about the kids your kids hang around with? Have you reminded your kids that “Birds of a feather, flock together?” Have you told your kids, “Show me who your friends are, and I’ll show you who YOU are.?” Aren’t you aware of the fact that cliches become cliches, because they withstand the test of time? Then how do you do an about face, and say there’s nothing wrong with close, long-lasting relationships with anti-Semites, paranoid hate mongers, indicted businessmen, and people who settle disputes with pipe bombs? When is the last time you stood in mud and didn’t get it on your shoes?”

  9. “Just how stupid is a man whose Pastor says he knows he [Pastor] was not getting the money(s) for the alleged purpose it was funneled, but the man doing the funneling, didn’t know it?”

  10. “Is turning about-face on campaign reform to refuse public funds for larger private donations, Barack Obama’s definition of change in Washington? Is this Barack Obama’s idea of “serving a greater good?” Gee, it looks an awful lot like Barack Obama, serving…….uh, Barack Obama.”

  11. Just what Christian values did Barack Obama learn in church? To viciously attack Governor Palin, and use our war heroes’ injuries to further their political goals? Is there no boundary of decency Barack Obama will not cross to “serve the greater good,” his campaign for President? Perhaps all the attendance in church was really to build a political base. Because to me, it seems an awful lot like Jesus is not Barack Obama’s Savior, Jesus is his disguise.”

  12. “NBC, the National Barack Company and the media are not pro-Obama? Boy, I’m confused. Or maybe the Associated Press can’t count. In their recent ad doing what they could to make fun of Sarah Palin, the AP “disclosed” that the Governor has been outside of the United States, just once. In the same article, about 5 paragraphs later, they stated she has also been to Canada, Mexico, and Kuwait and Germany to see the troops. Now we all suppose that the AP knew that some 4 paragraphs later, that the article would contain 4 more trips out of the U.S. But the AP chose to start the article with the “fact” [don’t giggle with food in your mouth] that Sarah had only been out of the U.S. just once. And these people say this stuff with a straight face.”

  13. “Barack Obama loves to speak out about racism in America. He does not mind the percentage of blacks who vote for him because they want a black President. He says nothing about Idi Amin murdering balcks, by the mile. He doesn’t want to offend Mr. Farrakhan. He doesn’t mind the whites who are voting for him, only to patronize him. This Barack Obama has a very “selective anger” for racism. Let’s not object to obliterating racism for the greater good, let’s just select the racism that’s hurting his campaign.”

  14. “Barack Obama says it’s time for America to put aside prejudice and vote him in as President. “It’s not “time” for a Spanish woman as a member of America’s largest majority. It’s not “time” for the poetic justice of an American Indian to be leading the Nation. It’s not time for a woman to be HIS running mate. It’s not time for the best man to be President. It’s not time for an old hero to be President. It’s not time for some kid-toting, Eskimo-loving, breath of fresh air from Alaska to be Vice-President. It’s not time for a Jew. Oh no. But it’s time to have Barack Obama run the country.

  15. “Let Chevy Chase spew his hate for Sarah Palin. Let NBC fall on their sword for Barack Obama. Let Huffington and The Times do the same. Let all these wealthy celebrities tell you how their movies, singing, and SNL skits are going to save your farm and your job in the factory. Barbara Streisand ought to know, right? Johnny Depp calls us “stupid American puppies” and you’ll follow his lead for President? Yeah, that’ll get your kid into college. You think Oprah endorsed Barack Obama out of her vast knowledge of politics? Sure, that’ll keep you from deciding “food or prescriptions this month?”

  16. “Are you one of the many who have been brainwashed to believe that Barack Obama could possibly have the experience to handle an economy crisis when he did everything to avoid taking a stand? When Barack Obama can’t criticize something that’s already been DONE, the lack of 20/20 hindsight has him delaying every remark until he can consult with someone. And here’s something the media doesn’t want to go near: How great do you think the economy will be when we are hit with another terrorist attack at home? I’d rather avoid a terrorist attack with John McCain than critique how Barack Obama handles one!

Put these ads on the air. If you’re in the GOP and want everyone to like you, be a florist. I do not see John McCain and Sarah Palin being defended with the vigor they deserve. I don’t care how new Sarah is to Nationa politics. She shouldn’t have to contend with this crap without a salvo being fired back. GOP…..as a lifelong Democrat who just jumped ship, I love you. But, grow a set!**