You pack up several thousand absentee ballots, for the jurisdictions from which your soldiers hail, ship them via Second Day FedEx to Afghanistan and Iraq, and you mark them "Urgent". You then inform CentCom that you screwed up getting ballots off to our fighting men and women in time, and that you would appreciate their help in making sure these folks get the ballots they need and deserve. Let them distribute them as requested: one per serial number. Include a list of those running for all state and local offices–be creative. Think , for a change. No big deal. There’s three weeks until the election. If we can pass a massive spending bill like TARP in 48 hours, then we can get this done, don’t you think?
You also provide each ballot with a self-addressed, pre-paid FedEx overnight envelope. This will also mean that our magnificent warriors can track the shipment of their envelopes back to the Illinois Secretary of State, who will then have their canvassers open them, and count them.
It seems like the least we could do to help make sure that those who are off fighting in the hell-holes of the planet to help establish and otherwise promote democratic prinicples, actually get to participate in democracy. If we have to dispense with certain byzantine election protocols to make it happen, well, if "votes" can be "discovered" in the back of moving vans that suddenly put the likes of Al Franken in the Senate, then we can damned well make sure our soldiers, sailors, airmen, and Marines get their legitimate votes counted.
Isn’t it absolutely fascinating that this only happens in the bluest of "blue" states like New York and Illinois? I thought the total rube, backward, inbred and incompetent states were those Down South– how come they can manage to get this sort of thing right? Hmm??