Face it, every campaign has a soundtrack.
And with just a little over three months remaining before the Iowa Caucuses, it’s time to assign super-duper officially-unofficial campaign songs to all the presidential candidates who just won’t stop believing.
Campaign dynamics are constantly shifting, which means there will be plenty of opportunities for changes in this list. There are still a lot of questions to be answered, even though we’re approaching the final countdown.
Will Joe Biden be welcomed to the jungle?
Will current frontrunners Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton keep finding ways to shake, shake, shake, shake, shake it off?
Or will they find out that falling is easy, it’s getting back up that becomes the problem?
Regardless, we’re stuck on this roller coaster until sometime next year, and nobody knows yet when the fat lady will sing. So we may as well enjoy this crowded and hilarious presidential cycle while it is ours to endure.
Donald Trump: Theme From Rawhide – The Blues Brothers
“Don’t try to understand ’em
Just rope, throw, and brand ’em
Soon we’ll be livin’ high and wide”
Ben Carson: “I believe I can fly” – R. Kelly
“I believe I can fly
I believe I can touch the sky
I think about it every night and day
Spread my wings and fly away”
[mc_name name=’Sen. Marco Rubio (R-FL)’ chamber=’senate’ mcid=’R000595′ ]: “When You Were Young” – The Killers
“You sit there in your heartache
Waiting on some beautiful boy to
To save you from your old ways
You play forgiveness
Watch it now, here he comes
He doesn’t look a thing like Jesus
But he talks like a gentlemen
Like you imagined when you were young”
Carly Fiorina: “In the End” – Linkin Park
“I tried so hard and got so far,
But in the end it doesn’t even matter”
[mc_name name=’Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX)’ chamber=’senate’ mcid=’C001098′ ]: “Eye of the Tiger” – Survivor
“Face to face, out in the heat
Hangin’ tough, stayin’ hungry
They stack the odds
Still we take to the street
For the kill with the skill to survive”
Jeb Bush: “Can’t Buy Me Love” – The Beatles
“I’ll give you all I got to give if you say you’ll love me too”
Mike Huckabee: “Living on a Prayer” – Bon Jovi
“We’ve got to hold on to what we’ve got
It doesn’t make a difference if we make it or not
We’ve got each other and that’s a lot for love
We’ll give it a shot”
[mc_name name=’Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY)’ chamber=’senate’ mcid=’P000603′ ]: “Angry All The Time” – Tim McGraw
“The reasons that I can’t stay don’t have a thing to do with being in love, And I understand that lovin’ a man shouldn’t have to be this rough, You ain’t the only one who feels like this world left you far behind, I don’t know why you gotta be angry all the time”
John Kasich: “Love the One You’re With” – Stephen Stills
“And if you can’t be with the one you love honey
Love the one you’re with”
Chris Christie: “The Distance” – Cake
“No trophy, no flowers, no flashbulbs, no wine,
He’s haunted by something he cannot define.
Bowel-shaking earthquakes of doubt and remorse,
Assail him, impale him with monster-truck force.
In his mind, he’s still driving, still making the grade…”
Bobby Jindal: “I Will Survive” – Gloria Gaynor
“Did you think I’d crumble
Did you think I’d lay down and die
Oh no, not I
I will survive”
Rick Santorum: “Boulevard of Broken Dreams” – Green Day
“I walk a lonely road
The only one that I have ever known
Don’t know where it goes
But it’s home to me and I walk alone”
[mc_name name=’Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC)’ chamber=’senate’ mcid=’G000359′ ]: “Destroy Everything” – Hatebreed
“Cleanse this world with flame…
Even an empty threat deserves a response you won’t soon forget
I must destroy everything that tries to infect”
George Pataki: “Nobody Knows Me At All” – The Weepies
“Very late at night and in the morning light,
nobody knows me at all.
Now I got lots of friends, yes, but then again,
nobody knows me at all “
BONUS ROUND: DEMOCRATS
Hillary Clinton: “Back in Black” – AC/DC
“Back in black
I hit the sack
I’ve been too long I’m glad to be back
Yes, I’m let loose
From the noose
That’s kept me hanging about
I’ve been looking at the sky
‘Cause it’s gettin’ me high
Forget the hearse ’cause I never die
I got nine lives
Abusin’ every one of them and running wild”
Bernie Sanders: “Goodies” – Ciara
“I bet you want the goodies.
Bet you thought about it.
Got you all hot and bothered.
Mad cause I talk around it.
Looking for the goodies
Keep on lookin’ cuz they stay in the jar”
Martin O’Malley: “I’m Too Sexy” – Right Said Fred
“I’m too sexy for my shirt
too sexy for my shirt
So sexy it hurts”
Lincoln Chafee: “Running on Empty” – Jackson Browne
“Running on – running on empty
Running on – running blind
Running on – running into the sun
But I’m running behind”
Jim Webb: “Creep” – Radiohead
“What the hell am I doing here?
I don’t belong here”
Agree? Disagree? What songs would you pick?
Let me know in the comments!