The Funniest Damn News Headline I've Ever Seen

Calling Obama’s speech “transcendent” the world’s most powerful woman said she cried her eyelashes off while listening to the Messiah accept his nomination from the Democrat party to be the Nation’s very first Kenyan-American President. Yes, I said “Kenyan.”

African American status is reserved for those descendants of slaves in America. Barack Obama is not such a descendant…and doesn’t have the right to call himself “African” American.

Oprah seems to agree, saying “he’s not an African-American candidate, he’s a candidate for Americans.” Nah-I guess she meant something altogether different…but I digress.

The Ghandi of the finer gender went on to suggest the speech was “the most powerful thing I have ever experienced.” MY eyelashes were effected by Obama’s tripe too…mine, however, were singed off instead of having been washed away by tears of rapture.

If she finds Obama’s pontifications and empty words more powerful than looking at the balance sheets of her bank accounts, she might as well just hand all that cash over to me…THAT would be the most powerful thing I would ever experience.