A Break In The Action For Some Humor

*Is there always too much dust on your H&K USP ?

Can’t seem to avoid those forever-occurring fine-line scratches affecting your Mossberg 12 gauge ?

Does your trophy-class, custom-built, Barrett M82 50 cal. travel with you to matches ?*

Well then you’re in luck, because finally available to the public from Swiss Navy Productions: Gun Wrappers !

Swiss Navy Productions Gun Wrappers were previously available only to the US Military and US Law Enforcement. Now, you too can own the finest weapons protection products available.

Swiss Navy Productions Gun Wrappers come in various models, including Clinging, Bitter and Typical.

Patented and trade-marked technologies have made high-end, mass production possible for these marvels of weapons protection.

‘Clinging Gun Wrappers’ provide righteous, jubilant … and waterproof … security for constitutionally protected ownership of your weapons of choice.

For those who want to ‘go green’, the new set of ‘Bitter Gun Wrappers’ are part of our Natural Defense line and are manufactured using only the highest quality extracts of Dandelion and Mustard Greens.

Our most popular product, the Swiss Navy Productions’ ‘Typical Gun Wrapper’, offers the average person top-line technology in everyday weapons protection at a budget price.

Available outer designs on all Gun Wrappers include a parchment background with your choice of text from The US Declaration Of Independence, The US Constitution and The US Bill Of Rights (Text from The Second Amendment is the most popular by far).

Swiss Navy Productions can customize the outer design to suit your needs, including range and gun club logos, you can submit your favorite photograph(s), or even your own artwork, such as a family photo. The only object Swiss Navy Productions will not print as the main design on any item produced is The Flag Of The United States Of America. This is due to our deep respect for our country and laws pertaining to Flag display (United States Code: Title 4, Chapter 1 ; Title 18, Chapter 33, Section 700 ; Title 36, Chapter 3).

All Swiss Navy Productions Gun Wrappers include a carry bag and have a one-Federal-election-cycle guarantee for material and workmanship from date of purchase.

Swiss Navy Productions proudly manufactures all of it’s products in the USA using materials exclusively made in the USA.

For sales to the public, NRA members receive a 10% discount. Military and Law Enforcement custom-unit sales continue as normal with our sincere thank you for agreeing that we should afford responsible gun owners the best means of protection for their personal weapons.

Wholesale inquiries welcome. Franchising not available at this time, as we are still ‘finding our way’ in the to-the-public business world.

Please be a responsible gun owner and enjoy your constitutionally granted rights wisely. Know your weapons systems thoroughly through study and practice. Ensure your weapons and ammunition when not being used are secured and ‘safed’ at all times and please your weapons regularly, especially after extended periods of non-use.

Swiss Navy Productions Gun Wrappers are designed to protect your weapons systems when they are not in use. Please remove your Gun Wrappers from your weapons prior to use and remember that true gun control is hitting your target at center with your first discharge.

Fifteen percent (15%) of all Swiss Navy Productions profits are joyfully donated to organizations benefiting US Military and US Law Enforcement families funds, in order to assist those who have lost loved ones in their call to duty and honor.

Coming soon from Swiss Navy Productions: Customized Stock Certificate Frames. We will soon introduce custom frames for use in displaying all your financial, insurance, airline and other industries stock certificates you receive from US Government ownership. After all, the US Government is using your money to purchase these corporations, you should receive something for that, not just an invoice.


OK, who out there thinks my company could and should actually design, manufacture and sell these products ? When I first started writing this, I was thinking, no way, because my business experience (with my partner Janie) was that we dealt with managing international rock bands. But now ? My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought, cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives.

Yes, I have too much time on my hands.



Kenny SolomonTypical Bitter God-Clinging Gun Owner ….. and NASCAR fan

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