Diary

Yes, Bragging (...aka, talking) About Grabbing a Woman by Her Privates Has to Stop

It is a sad commentary when being averse to a man bragging (meaning talking) about sexual assault in the age of Trump is considered PC.

On the flip side, the phrase sexual assault has been used by some women to call attention to themselves. A very well-meaning liberal (yes, they exist) started a Twitter campaign a few days ago calling on all women to post their personal stories of sexual assault. It has mainly stirred high emotion (think Black Lives Matter), and attention seekers are using the site and the phrase not as a cathartic release, but as a reason to be mad.


I get it. I do. Men are, well, gross sometimes. FYI: women are gross sometimes, too. We have all lived to tell the tale. But Trump’s video isn’t, by all decent human male accounts here at RedState, a general run-of-the-mill gross back and forth conversation between adults.

On the video, Trump brags about using the opportunities he has as a “star” to grab a woman physically. “Grab” is a pretty aggressive word. Trump, on policy, generally “vomits a word salad,” as some are apt to say; on the video, he isn’t reticent when he uses the word grab.

grab grasp or seize suddenly and roughly; seize forcibly or unscrupulously.

Women do not need dictionary.com to feel its meaning. They hear the word grab, and they think “taking without permission.”

Seize on the words “without permission,” and “nonconsenting.” I’m not sure why, but my argument has led some here at RedState to conclude I am subliminally advocating for banning books, censoring movies, abolishing music and believing in forming a bedroom squad ready to jail any who dare challenge sexual “norms.” You know what? Enjoy yourselves. I have no desire to restrict in any way how consenting adults in a free country decide their idea of intimacy, as long as their idea of “enjoy” isn’t abusive to another.


What’s the big deal *talking* about nonconsensual grabbing? First, how’s it working out for Trump? Not so good. Because when you talk about having grabbed a woman in her privates, people are going to think you grabbed a woman in her privates. Trump is dropping like a brick in his revered polls; especially with the ladies. It must follow that talking about sexually assaulting a woman is dumb.

Side note: If you wish to date or endure this election with your marriage intact, I suggest steering clear of advocating for grabbing random women in their privates. It will not help your cause. 

Second, sexual assault will not end until we stop talking about it as if it’s a part of normal society and “what men do” or “what men talk about in the locker room.” For abortion to end, society has to stop assuming that that’s “just what a woman will do when she has an unwanted pregnancy.” It took 300 years for our culture to change enough for it to be unacceptable that blacks should be considered property and 3/4 human. Change our narrative. Change our thoughts. Change our actions.


The end of sexual assault starts with men *not* bragging (aka, talking) to their male buddies about how they got away with grabbing a chick’s privates because the opportunity was there, not because she wanted them to.

As most of us have observed since the video was aired, whether political expediency or genuine disgust, in a decent day-to-day, it’s not cool. Nobody thinks you’re cool, Donald J. Trump.