No, *WE* do not suck, and *we* did not lose the election

We didn’t do it. I know that Achance is talking about the Republican Party and not conservatives, per se, and he’s right on. This is not an anti-Achance diary, it’s actually in agreement. But I want to make sure the distinction is clear about exactly who sucks, and who lost.

Conservatives don’t suck

and we didn’t lose the November election. In point of fact, we DID lose the primaries. But I will neither take nor share ANY blame for what happened in 2006 and 2008. Not one bit. Because I lobbied and worked intensely for something different at every turn than what the Party did. And so did pretty much the whole kaboodle of conservatives.

It is the party, the party leadership, the party apparatus dominated by people other than conservatives, and the 60% of the party that is moderate. We cannot help it if the bus driver parked the dang bus on railroad tracks.

I think we have enough diaries and front-page stories to go around, dealing with the particulars. But I’ll highlight a couple of areas in which we are frequently blamed for no good reason. Just to be a sport, I also will point out areas that conservatives can accept some blame. But that and no more.

Do not tread on us any more. Moderates, we don’t need your help figuring out how the Party got into such a sad state. We know why, and we are doing something about it.

Things conservatives didn’t do, but routinely get blamed for. Just a tiny sampler, actually:

  • The McCain loss. Well, McCain was not our guy, Fred was. And in large part, conservatives turned out and supported McCain far, far above what he deserved.
  • The so-called “disaster” of the Palin VP pick. Come on, now really.
  • 2006 — no, that was profligate spending by the people running the party (which were….. say it …… say it …… NOT FISCAL CONSERVATIVES)
  • Big-government conservatism — which is not conservatism, and did not come from conservatives. It came from moderates who wanted to trade on the conservative brand.
  • Oh yeah, my personal favorite: conservatives have neglected the children, allowing a leftist takeover of schools. Uh huh, right. Try attending a school board meeting in Texas, and see if conservatives aren’t starting fist-fights pretty much every meeting, every decision, trying to break the stranglehold of leftist indoctrination. Neglected the children, indeed.
  • Failure to enact conservative legislation when we had the President, the House, and the Senate. There you go with that “we” crap again. When were conservatives ever in charge? Remember, we picked Toomey, the Party picked Specter. We ran Laffey, the Party actively funded Linc Chafee against him.

Things you can actually hang around the necks of conservatives:

  • We don’t really organize well. Herding cats, all that. Day jobs.
  • We have not forcefully defended ourselves. But that is changing. Big time, be-yotch.
  • We have not aggressively taken over the party apparatus. Once again, changing. [Hello, House GOP Whip Cantor.]
  • We quit teaching conservatism after we won in 1994. We assumed people *got* it.
  • We have not defeated the influence of the Treason Media. Working on it, though, and NOT by :ahem: [GOP nominee] :ahem: whoring ourselves out to them.
  • We have only 4 of 9 scotus justices — but conservatives will happily take credit for Sam Alito not being named Harriet Meirs.
  • In terms of ‘wealth redistribution’, conservative-style, we have not figured out how to solve the distressing and chronic over-representation of beautiful women in Texas. All you other states, we are truly sorry about that, and I’d love to say we are working to solve this problem. But we’re not.
  • We have forgotten our roots. Nobody speaks of Edmund Burke from the Senate floor. Or Buckley, Reagan, Kirk, or even John Adams or James Madison.
  • We have allowed the party to get by with open primaries, and allowing the early primaries to be dominated by purple and blue states. Again, working on it.
  • Not rallying around Fred Thompson when we had a chance to support the one bona fide full-service conservative candidate. It is to our shame that in South Carolina, Fred’s last stand, far, far too many self-described conservatives crossed over to vote with the press and the Democrats to nominate the ‘electable’ one. SC conservatives, you owe the rest of us, freaking BIG-time, for that.

But that’s about it. And Republicans can just get off our backs, because we are taking over now. We’ve let the children screw it up for long enough, it’s time for some adult supervision. And for the record, you stupid, short-sighted moderates made this possible. You surrendered so much principle that finally nobody could tell any difference between you and the Democrats. So you lost the middle you sought to get under the big tent, and now there’s more of us in the party than there are of you.

Heh, heh, I just LOVE me some Mother Irony.