My reply to JPH: Conservative America's plan to defeat the majority media -- UPDATE

I’ve been thinking about this for a long time. I vote with JPH (Hey, Republicans When You Figure Out A Media Strategy, Call Me; Until Then, So Long.) in saying that the majority media have proven a nearly insurmountable force in unfairly using their position and influence to sucker Americans into electing and empowering Democrats, in spite of the abundantly obvious fact that most Americans do not approve of Democrat policies, positions, or morals on any level. However, unlike JPH I don’t await the feckless, toothless Republican Party’s battle plan.

Between the Bush Administration’s “Hunker-Down” plan, McCain’s “French Kiss” plan, and Congressional Republicans’ “Dem-Lite” plan, I just don’t have any confidence in the next Republican plan to cope with the 24×365 majority media onslaught.

This is a BIG problem, and the enemy is all of these things: formidable, ruthless, crooked, malevolent, supremely unscrupled, dishonest, dug-in, extremely well financed, organized, and arrogant. But this is my plan. Kill the beast.

How to do that? Haha, glad you asked.
First, I want to recap, touching on some of JPH’s well-done thinking. The media capitalize on 2 things here: Access and credibility. Simply put, on 3 fronts [TV, radio, and newspaper], the news is totally dominated by liberal outlets. Even during Rush Limbaugh radio broadcasts, every hour and half-hour is interrupted by ABC News Radio, where they spout the most vile form of slander and call it news.

While many Americans recognize the bias, and also recognize the excellent work being done by Fox News and the right media, no story is considered to have ‘legs’ unless it is picked up by one of the 3 main TV networks, or by the NY Times and/or Washington Post, or by the newswires Reuters and AP. All 7 of these institutions are viciously, bitterly leftist.

So we have a problem. It demands a solution, because the status quo will not work. Our Constitutional Republic, this Grand Experiment™, is being led down a slip-slope into oblivion, led by the left and fueled by the majority media. Let me offer as a given a few points about the media:

  • They will never be blackmailed into reporting honestly.
  • Their sinking fortunes and ratings aren’t deterring them.
  • They are dedicated to leftism to the point of obsession.
  • They now have the power of the government behind them to suppress opposition and competition via the so-called Fairness Doctrine.
  • Ignoring them or bypassing them has not diminished their credibility or influence.

So this is my plan.

  • Form an investment group.
  • Put at the head of it known conservatives with excellent business and political resumes [why does Dick Cheney come immediately to mind, anyway?]
  • Raise about $50 billion in investment capital from conservative Americans. I think that’s about enough money.
  • Buy the New York Times, ABC, and either AP or Reuters.
  • Fire every sorry SOB that works there, in any capacity in terms of writing, gathering, or telling news – except George Will.
  • Replace them with conservatives and a conservative agenda. Not squishes. The burgeoning right media has for most of a decade been a great proving ground for conservative talent. Between FNC, the conservative magazines (Human Events, NR, etc) and online blogs (Townhall, RedState), there is tremendous talent ripe for the picking. Pick it.
  • Buy Brit Hume from FNC and make him ABC’s anchor. Pay FNC whatever it costs to get him.
  • Let all of America know, unapologetically, that NOW, FINALLY, they are going to receive fair and balanced truth and a pro-American viewpoint from their news.

Some loose thoughts I have about the above plan.

  • If we get ABC, we get ABC Radio Networks, which currently provide hourly slander-casts on over 2000 radio stations. By comparison Rush is played on 600 stations.
  • existing syndication contracts by ABC, the New York Times, and AP have their stories fronted and linked nearly everywhere a person can look. If we control the message, we PWN.
  • We get to play the invent-a-poll game, just like everybody else!
  • By getting one of the big 3 broadcast networks, total credibility is achieved in one fell swoop.
  • $50 billion sounds like alot of money. I think McCain and the RNC raised what, a grand total of less than a billion (I’m having trouble locating exact numbers) in his 20-month campaign. However, those are DONATIONS. I’m talking about investment money. People’s 401K money, IRAs, These properties we are talking about are not junk bonds, and they’re not high-risk – they are well-established media companies with ongoing operations. $50 billion is alot. But shall we go for it, or shall we cower, whimpering in the corner?
  • In spite of some research, I’ve come nowhere close to figuring out approximate selling prices of any of these entities. I figure ABC is the most pricey. Are they worth $20 bil? $100 bil? Help, anyone?
  • Keep all network programming in place at ABC. Even Desperate Housewives [gag]. Credibility is based partly on the vastness of the empire.
  • We don’t have to buy the whole Treason Media – just key, well-positioned players.
  • The thing to guard against is betrayal or incompetence at the top. That’s why I want Dick Cheney. He kills.

So what do you think? Impractical, unworkable, too bold? OK, I’ll agree ONLY in terms of raising the capital. But otherwise, admit it. You like it, don’t you?

UPDATE : I have some more tangible answers to the ‘how much money’ question:
ABC: It’s hard to tell how much it would take to buy the ABC empire, but Disney, the owner of ABC, is publicly traded and has a market cap of $57 billion, with confirmed assets over $35 billion. My guess is that for $35 billion you could get majority ownership of Disney itself. As just a gross, amateur estimate, I bet we could get 100% of ABC for $30 billion in cash.
New York Times : Current market cap has dwindled to $1.1 billion. This is EXTREMELY attainable.
Associated Press: I’m afraid the AP is not attainable. It is owned by a consortium of TV, radio, and newspapers which both provide and consume the content. So the AP is not really an entity that can be bought.

Others of note:
Reuters: (AP’s chief competitor worldwide) market cap of $4.8 billion.
Washington Post: market cap of $4.65 billion
Citadel Communications: (a monster in radio news) market cap is $2.6 billion.