As my friends know, after having seen every Simpsons episode a gozillion times, I can tie the Simpsons into anything. Go ahead, try me. Anyway, the fact is, when I saw the headline in the Washtimes that The One would “… seek freeze on part of budget” I immediately thought, “Wow– he’s having a Diamond Joe Quimby moment.” In one episode Lisa delivers her Scout cookies one morning to interim mayor Diamond Joe Quimby who, like any good democrat, wants to take possession without paying but Lisa forces the issue, not having been issued her skeptics merit badge without reason. Finding the town treasury completely empty Quimby has a non-democrat moment– he doesn’t immediately start squawking for a tax increase. Lisa ends up paving the way for collecting unpaid back taxes.
However, like one would expect from Homer, T.O.’s “action” here– which I see has already been rejected by the Senate — is like Homer pretending to come to grips with his alcoholism. In another episode, Homer and the “surprisingly hot Mrs. Simpson” go to Oktoberfest, over imbibe and Homer wrecks the car on the way home. Like certain deceased politicians he seeks to avoid responsibility so he straps Marge in the driver’s seat and she ultimately ends up in rehab. At episode’s end she implores Homer to ease up on the drinking and he pledges to give up all rum based drinks, excluding mojitos and several others. Not mollified, she leans on him and he pledges to give up all clear alcohols. “Even Zima?” “I only drink Zima when I’m already drunk!” So what T.O. pledged was giving up Zima. It wouldn’t take Enron’s bookkeepers to keep the Porkulus and other of our wounds hemorrhaging money out of the formal budget process if they’re not already. T.O. doesn’t really need the budget to pursue his ends and therefore doesn’t mind giving up the Zima. And better yet, since it already got bounced in the Senate, no damage to his fiscal alcoholism– he can keep washing down the pork with Zima. No problem.