Diaries of Wokefulness, Chapter One

(AP Photo/Michael Sohn, File)

The following are seven stories- some obvious and some that received little or no publicity- over the past week in today’s woke culture.

Story 1- Berlin Film Festival Goes Gender Neutral

The Berlin Film Festival has decided to no longer hand out silver bear awards in the categories of Best Actor and Best Actress.  No, they’re not eliminating the award, but now lumping actors and actresses under a single category- Best “Performer.”  Could the Academy Awards be far behind?  Does anyone care?  Consider this: in 90 years of the Academy Awards, a total of five… count ’em…five women have been nominated.  The social justice activists may be celebrating now, but imagine how heads explode if a Jack Nicholson has to compete against a Meryl Streep and the male wins.  A solution: pick a male one year and a female the next and so on, acting ability be damned.

Story 2- Light is Racist

Well, according to one Canadian university which determined that physics is “a mirror of colonial patterns and social inequality,” especially “in the context of light.”  It seems that when you pass light through a prism and get the colors of the rainbow and the belief that white light (that which we see) has been all wrong all these many years because people like Newton and others before and after him did not take into account the views of “indigenous people” when passing light through a prism.  Hence, everything we know about the physical world is racist and the result of white people colonizing indigenous people.  Henceforth, the cover of Pink Floyd’s iconic album “The Dark Side of the Moon” will have a BLM banner passing through a prism creating a gay pride flag.

Story 3- Wonder Woman Gets a Make-Over

Apparently Wonder Woman, of DC Comics fame played by the beautiful Gal Gadot in the movies, got a one-time make-over in an effort to go woke.  Please click on this link to see what happens to Wonder Woman when she breaks into Nancy Pelosi’s refrigerator and devours 24 pints of designer ice cream.  Notice the diversity-approved skin tone of the Amazon princess.  That mane of hair has either stars in it, or Wonder Woman has a serious case of dandruff.  And did she borrow a pair of Barack Obama’s mom-jeans?  Or is she on her way to a Shania Twain concert?  Come to think of it, what happened to her breasts?  They’ve been flattened into barely noticeable pancakes.

Story 4- A Transgender Viking?

Swedish researchers found the body of a female buried in a Viking warrior grave.  The sex of the deceased revealed the tell-tale sign of femaleness: two X chromosomes.  This led some researchers to suggest that the body was that of a transgender female and some, taking it further, to suggest that the Vikings were way more woke than originally believed and accepted transgenderism.  Of course, other women in history pretended to be men given the circumstances of the time.  For example, Joan of Arc did so not because she was transgender, but to avoid being raped by an all-male army.  Considering that Vikings had a more rapacious appetite for rape than a French army, could it be that this Viking warrior pulled a Joan of Arc centuries before Joan of Arc?

Story 5- When Wearing Blackface is Just Fine and Dandy

Nina Simone was a black singer often referred to as “the high priestess of soul.”  At least that is what her official website says.  She was also a civil rights activist which prompted someone to suggest a movie biopic of the singer.  That was 2013 and actress Zoe Saldana was suggested which created a backlash because, in the views of some critics, Saldana was not black enough.  In fact, to play the role Saldana had her skin darkened.  You see, Saldana’s mother is of Puerto Rican ancestry and her father was Dominican.  This writer is confused about the racial intersectionality of wokeness, but it seems that if you have to darken your skin to play a dark-skinned black singer, there may be a problem.  The project was put on hold since Saldana’s black and Latina sides have filed suit against one another in Superior Court in a nasty custody battle.

Story 6- George W. Bush Paints a Book

Titled “Out of Many, One,” former President George W. Bush released a book of 43 of his paintings of immigrants to the United States.  One supposes he did so because diversity and all that.  In the introduction, Bush states:

While I recognize that immigration can be an emotional issue, I reject the premise that it is a partisan issue. It is perhaps the most American of issues, and it should be one that unites us. My hope is that this book will help focus our collective attention on the positive impacts that immigrants are making on our country.

Perhaps they are portraits of his gardener, ranch hand, stable boy, and house cleaner.  No one denies we are a nation of immigrants, as the popular phrase goes, and the “partisan” part of the issue is not immigration; it is illegal immigration which is something Bush did little to address in eight years at the helm.

Story 7- Misplaced Priorities in New York

As the crime rate soars in New York City, trash piles up along with the bodies of homeless people pissing on the walls of shuttered businesses, Bill de Blasio, the Communist mayor, found it in his heart to cut police funding by about $1 billion…billion with a “B.”  However, the city found enough money to provide his wife, who looks suspiciously like a reject from the set of the movie “Alien,” with $2 million to hire 14 assistants.  One is provided $70,000 a year to take pictures of her baking cookies.  Perhaps, Mrs. de Blasio could put that $2 million to better use and have some money left over for the photographer after seeking out a good plastic surgeon.  By the way, that $2 million could hire 47 police officers.