Diary

The Hits Keep Coming: Wuhan Humor

AP Photo/Mark Schiefelbein

In a continuing effort to apprise readers of some of the more humorous events that may or may not have anything to do with the Wuhan flu, here are four somewhat amusing stories for your perusal.

It’s Not a Chinese Virus, Damn It!

According to San Antonio mayor Ron Nirenberg, referring to the current virus as the “Chinese virus” could be a form of hate speech.  And he got a resolution passed in City Council by an 11-0 vote urging citizens to snitch on anyone using mean words.  Sure…there have been some jokes about people, who happen to live in China, being connoisseurs of eating roasted bat-on-a-stick and the belief that those in the region like to occasionally eat the family pet, but this pales in comparison to the suppression of the fact that this thing originated in China.  Mr. Nirenberg seems to believe that the virus somehow leads to anti-Semitism also, although one is unsure how large the Jewish population of San Antonio is and, more importantly, whether there have been any anti-Semitic “hate crimes.”

Our Lord Masters Have Decided

Well, YouTube, Twitter, FaceBook and Vimeo have all taken down the 26-minute film “Plandemic” which questions the pandemic.  Geez- Twitter even banned hashtags with the word in it.  The proffered reason was that it was “dangerous” and that we might do something stupid like walk outside to plant some seeds without a mask.  Because we are not the almighty scientist, we cannot confirm or deny the contents of the film because we cannot see the film since we are all just too stupid.  Instead, we just have to rely on the scientists and experts to make up our minds for us as we huddle in our homes and watch the latest Covid special telecast on 26 channels simultaneously.

Bad Cop or Bad Sex?

Darwin Fontenot is/was a police officer in Port Barre, Louisiana all of 21 years old, a recent graduate of the police academy and apparently one very horny dude.  During a traffic stop, he suggested to a young woman that he would not issue her a ticket in exchange for some afternoon delight.  Apparently, the woman agreed, then reported the incident to authorities.  Fontenot was charged with malfeasance and third degree rape which brings up two points.  First, is it “third degree” rape because of the quality of the sex?  Second, I believe the answer is in the affirmative since the woman reported it.  Of course, Fontenot counters the sex was “consensual” because apparently women stopped in Port Barre, Louisiana for a traffic offense are just out looking for sex with cops.

One Small Step for Sanity

One unnamed 13-year-old managed to strike a small blow for sanity against the transgender agenda.  She- or her parents- filed a complaint against the local school’s “Trans toolkit” which was distributed to local schools claiming it was an invasion of her privacy to allow little boys claiming to be little girls to use the real girls bathroom to catch a glimpse of real little girls.  The Oxfordshire county officials originally challenged her challenge claiming there was no evidence horny little 13-year-old boys would do such a thing, but had to back down after the court there ruled her complaint was “officially arguable.”  It’s a small win for the sane among us, so celebrate it when and where you can.