A Coronavirus Diversion of Laughs: The Foreign Edition

A Coronavirus Diversion of Laughs: The Foreign Edition
(AP Photo/Ng Han Guan)

In a continuing effort to divert the reader’s attention from the latest “grim milestone” achieved in your state (unless you’re in Wyoming, Montana, or Idaho where like 3 cases a day are big news), here are some other stories NOT about the damn disease.  Well… one is about the Wuhan flu, so sorry.

Another Strike Against Chinese “Cuisine”

This is not about someone stopping innocently at a wet market and ordering up a nice, heaping bowl of bat stew.  This is about a 23-year-old woman who decided to eat some raw frogs one day whereupon she was rushed to the hospital with a headache and seizures.  Imagine the doctor’s surprise when he found a 6-inch parasite (worm) wriggling around in her brain.  Thankfully, the little bugger was successfully removed.  Doctors note that raw food is loaded with parasites and this one entered her bloodstream, took a wrong turn at the carotid artery and ended up in her brain instead of her lungs where they usually end up leading one to question how many of these worms have been removed from the lungs of a Chinese citizen?

A Strange German Pervert “Tradition?”

There are two cases recently out of Germany that are disturbing.  It appears that on these two occasions, believing they were responding to the discovery of a dead body, police arrived only to find really life-like blow-up sex dolls.  In one case, the discarder was stupid enough to leave a box of other “junk” he threw out that included his address.  He was later arrested and charged with “improper disposal of waste.”  The next time you’re on your walk, jog, or bike ride, ignore those legs sticking out of a blanket on the path.

It’s Not Exactly Hockey…

Canada gave us hockey, the greatest sport on earth, and possibly bacon…oh, and curling, I believe, but the Norwegians may have something to say about that, but I digress.  Back in 2011, one Canadian from Quebec bet another Canadian from Quebec $517,000 that he could beat him in a game of rock-paper-scissors.  Canadian #2 took him up on his wager and won causing Canadian #1 to take out a mortgage on his home.  Thankfully, a Canadian judge intervened and ruled that Canadian #1 does not have to pay a penny because Quebec law considers wagers legal if the activity concerns “skill.”  The judge ruled that RPS is not a game requiring skill, hence all bets are off.

Tunisia Moves Into the Modern World?

Mounir Batour is the leader of a gay rights organization in Tunisia.  To the unaware, Tunisia is an Arab Muslim country and Muslims generally look down on homosexuality to the point they toss you off the top of a building in some places.  According to Batour, the government of Tunisia officially recognized a gay marriage.  Why all well and good (?), Batour also notes that there are many homosexuals in Tunisian prisons because they violated the law and committed the crime of being gay.  So unless gay couples in Tunisia get the prison cell suite…

Baby Steps in Saudi Arabia

Raif Badawi is a blogger in Saudi Arabia  who was sent to prison for ten years having committed the crime of “insulting Islam.”  Not only ten years, but he was also sentenced to 1,000 lashes!  Thankfully for Mr. Badawi, the Saudi kingdom announced they were abolishing flogging and will instead henceforth fine or imprison people instead.  The decision was retroactive meaning that anyone waiting for their flogging were given a reprieve and no longer have to bear their backs for a lashing.

And Finally, Your Obligatory Wuhan Virus Story

It would appear that the fine folks in Iran have graduated from licking Muslim shrines- which Allah himself warned against in a press release- to drinking methanol to cure themselves of the dreaded virus.  And cure themselves they did since methanol is toxic if ingested (it likely says so on the bottle, even in Farsi) and at least 700 Iranians have died as a result.  From licking shrines to chugging down methanol and they still wonder why we have Home Depot, Wal-Mart and more cable channels than they do…

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