Before I begin, I just want to tell you that right off that this post is at the top of the posts list. You see it right there. Right when it was posted, it was at the top. First. That’s important because it shows that I’m obviously right that because of its position. This is the classiest, most luxurious post ever.
You see how fabulous it is? Its great, just great. I am smart and I can get the words and meaning across because I graduated a mid-tier public university, somewhere in the top 15% of my class. This was back when that meant something. You know before grade inflation made everyone “smart”. But look, that’s a long time ago. I’m brilliant, so let’s just leave it at that.
Now look, all these people are going to tell you that I’m not the most fabulous, best, most luxurious poster on RedState. They’re wrong. Because I’m not only the most fabulous, best, most luxurious poster on RedState, I’m the most fabulous, best, most luxurious poster on the history of the Interwebz. No one can beat me. Really. Who’s going to beat me? No one. I just started and I’m already better than everyone else. Look how I used “Interwebz”, that’s how it’s done. With the ‘z’ at the end and whatever.
Now that you’ve stayed with me this long, you’re nodding along that, “hey, this IS the most fabulous, very exquisite, really just the very best post I’ve ever read.” Because it’s luxurious. But you know, I have to tell you this. There’s always someone going to say blah, blah, blah. They.Just.Don’t.Get.It. How could they? If they got it, they would know what I know. That I’m just killing it in this post. I have a talent for posting posts. Ones just like this. It’s really, really, very great.
I know, I played the game a long time. Posting comments on other posts. Now look, I’m on this side. And I have to tell you, I’m a natural. I’m simply the best. It really fits me. Right to the top. I come in with the most luxurious post RedState has ever seen. It’s really just fabulous. Now you have to be careful here. All these special interest are going to ask for this and that, but it’s not going to happen with me because I have taken no money for this post. Even though it’s the best.
And when I make more posts, I’m going to have the best advisers around me. I don’t need it, because look how good I am at it already. But I can’t do it all myself. Maybe I could, I probably could, but I’m not going to need to because I will have the best help anyone could ever want to have. I surround myself with the best, the smartest, really just the top, very, very best of anyone. Who can beat that? No one, of course.
Thanks for letting me post this, even though you should be thanking me for making the classiest, best, really just a great post for you.