Don't Vote for Scott Brown Because He Drives A Truck

Hey, I have a message for the great people of the Bay State: Do not under any circumstances vote for Scott Brown, because he drives a truck and it truck drivers are elitists. The president was stumping in Mass for the utterly incompetent Martha, Martha, Martha Coakley and he took a few digs at Scott Brown and in so doing made fun of him because Brown drives a truck. Now, I don’t understand something here, so Scott Brown is out of touch with the people of Mass because he drives a pickup truck? As oppose to Martha Coakley thumbing her nose at the idea that, I don’t know you actually have to shake hands and interact with the people in order to get their votes. I know, I know Martha Coakley was appalled at the very idea of shaking the hands of the so called “unwashed masses” but surely someone in her campaign had to tell her the idea behind a political campaign. You greet the people, tell them why they should vote for you, and you hope they actually vote for you. See Martha, was that too difficult to comprehend?

Barack Obama can make fun of Scott Brown and his truck all he wants, but not many coastal elites drive pickups, nor have they ever seen one, I’m halfway kidding. But seriously this immature dig at Mr. Brown is a desperate act of a desperate and prideful man who knows deep down his charm offense is offensive like bad breath in a crowded elevator during the dog days of August while the person with that bad breath picks their nose and farts three times. Nothing is rubbing off, Obama’s popularity is going down faster than Lisa Ann in “Nailin Palin”.

Tomorrow the polls open for the people in Massachusetts and I have a feeling Coakley will somehow against all reasoning and reality pull a victory out of her pompous, condescending arse . I don’t know, call me a pessimist but with the Dem’s entire agenda on the line I doubt these people will have the utmost to play fair and nice with old Scotty boy. If we know Democrats, and we do and we all hate them, they play dirty, real dirty, like Gorgeous George and Jake the Snake Roberts dirty. The Dems are like that guy in the casino who has mirrors on his shoes and X-ray sunglasses. Although I must say if Brown won I wouldn’t be at all shocked. I don’t know much about Scott Brown except that he drives a truck, and apparently that’s a bad thing, and he posed for some magazine in the 80s. When I saw that photo spread of Scott Brown I thought to myself: “When did Richard Gere pose for Playgirl?”

But that aside, this race is important, more important than Virginia and New Jersey because the fate of the nation rests on the shoulders of a man who looks like Julian from “American Gigolo“. So to the people of Massachusetts I ask you to vote with your heads and not your hearts. The last time we saw this many people vote with their hearts a man with the middle name Hussein got elected president. So be smart, think about the consequences if Martha Coakley became the Senator from Massachusetts and was the final nail in the coffin for 1/6 of our economy. It’s like Scott Brown said, this isn’t Teddy’s seat, and it’s not the Democrats’ seat, this seat belongs to the people.