Why I Wish I Was Liberal

I’ve been thinking a lot about this over the last year. Over the course of my life I’ve been accused of being stubborn (I prefer to call it tenacity) and that includes my strong belief in conservatism both fiscally and socially. But lately, I’ve been pretty exhausted and sometimes I find myself wishing I were a liberal. Seriously. It would cause me a lot less stress.

If I were a liberal,

I would believe everything the media told me–I’d be afraid at the appropriate times believing the catastrophes the government or media reported and then be able to calm down when Obama, Eric Holder, Janet Napolitano or David Axelrod told me everything was OK. And I would know and believe that everything that happened was somehow really connected to George Bush and was never Barack’s fault. I’d religiously believe in our leader to do just what he promised. I’d know that when he unselfishly took this job, he walked into a rat’s nest and I’d understand that sometimes it takes decades to clean up a rat’s nest. I’d hope our president would be with us for a long time because whenever he talked, I’d be soothed by his voice and continued commitment to care for us. Our government would always provide for me so long as I continued to believe.

I would LOVE political correctness and try to remove all that was offensive from my life. For instance, I’d become comfortable with a very narrow vocabulary. I’d carefully watch all of my actions to make sure I would not step on any one’s toes–this would become my moral code.  I’d feel good about this and even proud that I was so socially “aware.” I’d champion social justice–for everyone–regardless of gender, sexual orientation, citizenship status, etc. There would be no absolutes; I would not have to believe in any one thing but in every thing and nothing so as not to offend. My new mantra would be, “Whatever feels good!”

I’d be embarrassed by America’s wealth, power and possessions. For example, I’d feel shame about the U.S. having so many big cars: I’d drive a little Mini or hybrid or better yet a golf cart and I would approve of whatever Obama could do to help improve our image overseas. I’d pray for the day when we could be just like Canada, France, Spain and Greece–where people are truly equal. That is why I’d agree with George Soros that the economic crisis was the best thing to happen to this country to send us down the road to socialism.

I’d delight in all of the stories Al Gore tells us about how the environmentalists are going to save the dying polar bears and I’d wait on pins and needles for Cap and Trade to pass to punish the evil companies destroying our planet.  I’d rail against the corporations that not only pollute our beautiful land but also hoard bonuses and steal from all of us. I’d believe that most of what is wrong with this world is because of them. I would feel strongly that they needed to be taken down to size and support anything that happened to achieve this.

I’d be able to watch any TV news channel I wanted and know I was getting the real truth. I’d only have one radio station to listen to but that’s all I’d need. I’d be able to read just about any paper and get the same information–from so many sources how could it not be true? I would not have to worry about our country and the world anymore because I’d know we were going in the right direction–finally.

I’d NEVER have to do research or bother with the facts, I’d just disagree with everything opponents said insulting them until they gave up. Easy as pie and I wouldn’t have to think. (Dear Lord, I am so tired of thinking!!!) I’d never have to protest–why protest when things are going perfectly? Violent protests made by my like-minded fellow liberals would not bother me; I’d trust that they had a good reason for behaving the way they did. I might even yell as I relaxed on the couch.  I could watch those misguided racist Tea Partiers while I did word find puzzles and read People magazine and I’d feel sorry for them—(being so ill-advised by conservatism). I’d finally have the TIME to read mindless page after page in the latest tabloid about Michelle Obama’s favorite nail polish color. I’d do my own nails IN that color.

I’d thrill to think that in a few years EVERYONE could have health care—free!  I’d believe that all people should be the same, make the same amount of money and that anyone who made more should be willing to give it up. I’d put all my trust in the unions to protect and fight for me and mine. The fact that they were lockstep with the government would be comforting.

I’d be confused as to why anyone would not want amnesty–if the government could care for me and my family for free, why not everyone else’s family too?  I wouldn’t worry about calling my senators or going door-to-door or volunteering as just in life, the less I did, the more I’d gain. In my little world, that would sound pretty relaxing! I could actually quit my job, collect unemployment making up to $2K a month and then get welfare and food stamps for doing every day what I now live to do only on Saturday mornings–sleep late and dink on my laptop! I would not worry about my weight, physical health or exercise–these problems would not be my responsibility–but rather society’s.

I’d be so happy that all of the movie stars were on my side of history and supported all I believed in. I’d never avoid attending a film or event by someone radical.  I would not have to avoid anything public because, politically, I would understand media events. In addition every comedian would tell jokes that were very funny to me.  Jon Stewart and Bill Maher and Michael Moore would make total sense. I’d love Nancy Pelosi and wonder where she got her clothes and never worry about what she might be scheming to do next. I’d be able to sleep all night (and most of the day for that matter).

I would not have to believe in the Constitution. It is so very long and takes a lot of effort to comprehend. I would agree that it would be a “living” document that could be changed–like into Cliff Notes or a comic book which has happened to lots of other hard to understand books. Besides, a lot of the Constitution does NOT “feel good” so that right there would be a good reason to oppose it. It definitely would constitute way too much work and I’d definitely feel no guilt avoiding it.

What I’d really love the most is being able to be a part of every group I’d enter into. For instance, if I worked for the government in a union-supported job (which now are most of the jobs available), when my co-workers talked about a political issue, I’d be able to agree and not be bothered by resentment. Politics discussed in front of me or with me at work would always be the politics I felt comfortable about. Publicly stated political comments by my superiors would make me feel warm and fuzzy instead of conflicted inside. I would never have to be silent or grind my teeth in fear for my position and I’d always be able to nod and wholeheartedly agree.

I’d be considered to be the compassionate, caring one and be able to look askance at anyone who disagreed with me as a “hater,” or a “racist,” etc. I’d worry about things like protecting the earth from drilling, wind energy, the whales and pesticides rather than the survival of our country or future generations. The government would take care of all children–after all–as I’ve been told–it does take a village.

Yes. I would love to be a liberal but I just couldn’t live with myself if I went down that path. I made the mistake of being born into a God-fearing, hard-working value-laden family with parents from what has been called “The Greatest Generation.” My dad died one year ago next Saturday. He died a patriot with a heavy heart witnessing the destruction of liberty. I wish I could turn to him for advice right now, but I’m glad he doesn’t have to watch anymore what is happening to the country he fought for and loved. He and many of my relatives served in several different wars from World War 2 to Vietnam to Iraq. My family is made up of persevering, conservative Americans who will do almost anything to save the USA, but I’m tired. I’m so tired. Like many of you, I work a 60-70 hour a week job AND I volunteer and blog and march in parades and attend Tea Parties and fight every day for the sanctity of the Constitution.

So, even though sometimes I wish I could just relax and be a liberal, I know I can’t. For my country, my children and grand children and for my father’s memory and in his honor, I will never stop defending America and fighting for liberty.

God help me, I’m just too damn stubborn.