Believe it or not, it used to be my job years ago to come up with those titles to legislation my bosses were drafting.

Here are my nominations for titles for the Obama Budget or future “stimulus” or bank rescue plans:

Federal Action to Relieve Taxpayers (of their money) (FART) Act.

Save Taxpayers from Uniformly Performing Incoherent Decisions (STUPID) Act.

Taxpayers Helping Everyone for a Future Together (THEFT) Act.

Rescuing Our Banks to Better Enjoy Deliverance (ROBBED) Act.

Guarantee Our Destiny (GOD) Act.

Securing Lives And Validating Economic Relief Yes! (SLAVERY) Act

Letting Obama Save the Economy (LOSE) Act

People Opting for Opportunity and Relief (POOR) Act

Delivering Economic Action for Today’s Health (DEATH) Act

Deterring Incoherent Choices Today, Acting for Tomorrow’s Opportunities and Relief (DICTATOR) Act