What Herman Cain Needs To Say

From time to time, I let my imagination run wild, and assume the persona of a political speech writer.  I think about what I would write for a sitting politician, or a hopeful candidate.  In today’s post, I am compelled to write something for Herman Cain.  The harassment allegations against him are again diverting our attention from the ultimate goal of the 2012 election: removing the current President from office.  Mr. Cain and his staff have been inept and confused in their dealing with this problem, and I believe my prepared statement to the press for Mr. Cain, might bring some clarity and closure to the issue.

Ladies and gentlemen of the press.

Over the last two weeks, allegations have come to light accusing me of harassment toward some of my past employees.  These allegations are being driven largely by an attorney for one of those employees.  My remarks today are addressed primarily to him, and to any other attorney who may consider following his path.

In today’s business world, when claims are raised of harassment, slight or insult in the workplace, many companies offer cash settlements to avoid costly and lengthy litigation even if the claims do not appear to be valid.  An amount is determined that is sufficient to make the complainant “all better”, and in return the company requires a confidentiality agreement that legally binds all involved parties to non-disclosure of any details of the alleged misdoings.

This is common, and happens more than you know because most people move on with their lives and careers.

So my question today is this:  What do you want from me?  As an attorney, you know neither I nor your client may legally discuss these charges, their validity or their resolution.

Are you trying to shake me down for more money in return for your client’s continued silence?

Or has your sense of civic duty compelled you to inform the public of my possible unfitness for office?

If we want to talk about past indiscretions, we might also mention FDR’s not so secret mistress, President Obama’s experience with cocaine and Bill Clinton’s escapades both before and after assuming the Presidency.

So I ask again:  What do you want from me?

I am running for the Office of the Presidency because I love this County, and I love its people, and it is killing me to see them suffer under the rule of fiscal incompetence.  It is killing me to see our standing in the world crumble from misdirected or non-existent foreign policy.  It is killing me to see the worldwide chaos that is a direct result of lack of leadership in this greatest Country the world has ever known.

That is what is important right now.  That is where we need to direct our attention.  That is what we need to be talking about.

And you ambulance chasing lawyers, need to crawl back under the rocks you came from.

Thank you for your time ladies and gentlemen.

Originally posted on 11/05/2011 at ConservativeCompass.com