Middle East Explained: Southern Style

A True Southerner understands and sympathizes with the circumstances of Israeli Jews living in the Middle East. Southerners completely understand the concept of property rights and the Rule of Law. This is why most of us just do not support a “Two State Solution” as the Solution.

Lemme break it down for you, Southern style:

Let’s say you live next door to a couple of guys that really hate your guts. In fact, from the moment you moved in, all they could talk about was how they were gonna kick your azz and send you back to where you came from. Heck, all you wanna do is kick back after working hard all day and enjoy a little life. Your neighbors, on the other hand, have plenty of time to curse you and make life miserable since they depend on their relatives for a living and sit on their azz all day.

Then, one day, while you were having a cook-out or something to celebrate your birthday, these two guys sneak over to your house and start tearing up your stuff, screaming that they are gonna kill you. Thankfully, your BBQ guests are pretty good at self-defense and their plans are foiled.

You sue your neighbors in State Court for all the damages and get a judgment, fair and square. You execute on the judgment by taking their only asset: the house next door. It’s a pretty good set-up cause your former neighbors, Mr. Ham and Mr. Fat have to move way cross town so it’s harder to mess with you.

Imagine your surprise when Mr. H. and Mr. F go back to an International Court and convince a judge that, if they just get their house back, they will leave you alone and live in peace. To make matters worse, they even convince the Judge to give them access to go across your yard to get to the bus stop at the corner. All this while they continually tell your neighbors that they hate your guts and want to kill you.

Now, what true Southerner would support this?

As a descendant of Jefferson Davis, I guess that I could request that the USA recognize the pre-1865 borders or something.

(Cross-posted at Itsaboutliberty.com)