The giant hydra of smoke, mirrors, barbed wire and rationing, a.k.a. the so-called “health care reform” bill has been posted online. If you would all turn to page 2,099 you will find the passage that allows the U.S. Federal Government to reform your health care by…Taking over student loans?

Geez, that’s right. I forgot the last time I went in with body aches, fever, chills, and sneezing that along with the Z-pac I may need a student loan. Of course! It’s what I’ve been doing wrong and why I seem to get this seasonal flu every, like, season. If I had only added Government Provided and Administered Student Loans to my treatment I’d be cured! Just take two or four or six or whatever and when you decide you can’t pay them back down the road – or if you go to work in an approved government service field – your loans will be magically forgiven*! (*forgiven meaning that middle class taxpayers will render more tax unto Caesar to pay for you to blow off your debt or work for a “government approved” entity (i.e. whatever they’ll be calling “Organizing for America” or ACORN or whomever 20 years from now).

Did I miss something? HOW do student loans affect “more affordable and universally available health care”? Or Pell Grants (same page)? Or the “College Access and Completion Innovation Fund” (same page)? Or “Investment in historically Black colleges and universities and other minority-serving institutions” (same page)?

And does getting a student loan or providing more Pell Grants mean I can still keep my doctor?

Add this steaming pile a manure to the talking points as to why this bill is a complete sham.

Now I know how the mainstream media missed this – they are very busy covering important things…like the Massa scandal. And, uh, something Sarah Palin said. And…

But another big dropped ball by the Republicans. They’ve had weeks to add this nonsense to the other talking points, AND missed a big chance to hit the President square in with this early on during the Health Care Summit/Fashion Show and Car Meet last month. In fact, I’m surprised Alexander didn’t pause in the middle of his opener and say, “By the way, Sir, did you know there’s nearly 22 pages in ‘your approved bill’ about taking over the Student Loan system and giving grants to all these colleges for completely non-medical purposes? How does this affect your stated goal of making health care more affordable and efficient?”

Add this to the Louisiana Purchase, the CornHusker Kickback, $300 million for a hospital in Connecticut and, well, you get it. It’s all politics as usual – at least as usual when you believe in the expansion of the Federal Government. It’s yet another reason why this bill is less about reform and all about expanding government, bureaucracy and taxes.

But hey, maybe it’s just silly ol me not being sophisticated enough to know that when I say “Improve the health care system, make care more affordable, more efficient, and more accessible,” I really mean “I need the government to run student loans, too!”