Somehow We Aren’t Surprised, Are We? Order a Pizza, Get a TSA Job

Posted by Ron Robinson (Diary)

Monday, July 12th at 8:49PM EST

11 Comments

Recommenders: Kenny Solomon (Diary), kowalski (Diary), eastbaylarry (Diary), nessa (Diary)

Anybody who ever stood in an airport line already suspected. ‘Nuff said. H/T Drudge.

11 Comments Leave a comment

What about guns?...... When do we get guns ?

Kenny Solomon (Diary) Monday, July 12th at 8:53PM EST (link)

Heh,

It’s not that often I can get in a Eugene Tackleberry reference and have it make total sense to the topic and still be total snark at the same time.

Smooth.

NeoKong (Diary) Monday, July 12th at 9:22PM EST (link)

I’m still waiting for the chance to say
“You’re gonna’ need a bigger boat”

Follow me on Twitter.

There are so many questions....

kowalski (Diary) Monday, July 12th at 9:06PM EST (link)

There are so many questions that need to be answered about this.

Which pizza places are receiving the TSA boxes? It can’t be all of them, so how does the TSA decide who to send them to?

Who is accountable for overseeing the pizza places the TSA is distributing the boxes to?

Are they getting paid to distribute pizza with the job offers on the boxes? Why does Janet Napolitano think that trolling for employees for high-security jobs at Homeland Security by putting the job offers on pizza boxes is going to yield better applicants?

How much does each box printed for the TSA cost? It’s a big, cardboard box. Do they pay the full cost of the box, or just the printing, plus the fee to the pizza shop? Is it an opt-in deal? Did they send offers to all the pizza shops in the area asking them if they wanted to participate?

Aren’t there more targeted ways of reaching potential applicants for TSA jobs that might be more qualified? Like direct mail? Or talking to people at local colleges? Or is the TSA just so desparate to hand out security jobs to anyone who walks in the door that they’re advertising on pizza boxes?. Let’s face it, folks, even UPS doesn’t advertise for job positions like this, so TSA has got to be really desparate for, ahem…bodies.

By the way, what’s the starting salary?

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On the application form....

kowalski (Diary) Monday, July 12th at 9:15PM EST (link)

“Why did you apply to be a security officer for the TSA?”

…..

“Well, I was sitting around watching a rerun of Dirty Jobs and getting baked with my buddy Jim Anchower. There was only a 12 pack left in the fridge and two stale pieces of Pizza Hut that he bought six months ago and we’ve both been a little afraid to throw out, so we decided to order out for pizza,

First we had to conduct a thorough search of the couch for some change….which is where this idea got planted in my head…

[long story....]

…but finally when the guy from the pizza place drove up just like he usually was, the box looked different, and it wasn’t just the weed. We noticed it but we were so hungry we didn’t think about it until the next morning. He’s trying to clean the place up because his girlfriend is coming over, flips the box closed, and starts stuffing it in a garbage bag. I’m just walkin’ in the room after my morning bowl and I smacked him upside the head: “Dude, are you nuts? Look at that! Just call that number and we can get a job at the TSA.”

Later that afternoon I logged into the website and fired up the Festiva……

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You finally nailed it with your last guess.

Ron Robinson (Diary) Monday, July 12th at 9:16PM EST (link)

>>> Or is the TSA just so desparate to hand out security jobs to anyone who walks in the door that they’re advertising on pizza boxes?.

Apparently yes. That’s why I thought it was worth a post.

>>> Let’s face it, folks, even UPS doesn’t advertise for job positions like this, so TSA has got to be really desparate for, ahem…bodies.

Good point. But actually, UPS hires pretty highly qualified people and vets them very thoroughly.

For the starting salary, try going to the web address on the pizza box – they probably know there…

________________________________________
Ron Robinson
Chair, AD 49 Republican Central Committee
California Republican Central Committee
PROCINCT Author/ Founder
The Precinct Project
Unified Patriots – How-To: Activists Taking Action!

I worked for UPS

kowalski (Diary) Monday, July 12th at 10:00PM EST (link)

I worked for UPS and the only problem was the fact that one one of the union bosses on the floor tried to make me (who was one of the handful of certified HazMat responders at the facility I worked for) misstate a report on a bucket of spilled bleach and turn it into a hazardous incident report.

So be careful when you talk about how “qualified” UPS employees are, because I worked for them in Maryland and in addition to handling ammunition for the Laurel Proving Ground I cleaned up HazMat spills for them. I decided I’d had enough when I was basically given the “gloves on treatment” by the Union foreman who wanted me to make a household bleach spill into a “big problem” — or else. Just sayin’.

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Sorry Aberdeen Proving ground

kowalski (Diary) Monday, July 12th at 10:02PM EST (link)

I worked in Laurel. I got tired of being muscled around by a union guy who wanted me to help him shut down the facility. This was in advance of the big UPS strike more than a decade ago. It’s probable that the’ve kicked the heavies out by this point, but who knows? I’m not going back.

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And by the way in that instance

kowalski (Diary) Monday, July 12th at 10:15PM EST (link)

I did the only thing I could think of to get myself out of the hammerlock and got myself fired by showing up for work late several days in a row. I’ve never used my work experience at UPS on a resume, and I regret working for them now, but it is true that there were a lot of very hard working people (mostly the women in the facility in the shift I worked) who were trying to raise families and I’m sure didn’t want to get caught in the crossfire.

So I made the only reasonable exit I could at the time, rather than do what I thought was something really reprehensible and get the entire facility closed down because of the Big Paws guy who was pushing me around. I really wasn’t interested in getting killed, either.

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TSA, minimum starting wage is

texasgalt (Diary) Monday, July 12th at 10:10PM EST (link)

17,083 and max pay is $155,500.

There is an incredible number of job classifications and pay bands. Who knew? Great move, when these folks were federalized.

http://www.tsa.gov/join/careers/pay_scales.shtm

grrr . . should be "There are" -nt

texasgalt (Diary) Monday, July 12th at 10:15PM EST (link)

TSA...

zroxx (Diary) Tuesday, July 13th at 8:46PM EST (link)

is an example of the very worst in runaway government sprawl. It was created by the “Aviation and Transportation Security Act” passed on November 19, 2001. That’s about 68 days after 9-11. It now employs 50k on the taxpayer dime and has routinely failed to live up to expectations since it got rolling.

How can anyone expect a 50k plus government entity conceived over only 10 weeks to do anything but waste piles of cash and accomplish little more than the production of amusing stories like this one.