Asking Why can be the most important talking point of all…


I recently spent several days with my niece who is 23, after her grandmother (my mother in law) passed away.  Since I am a self avowed Glenn Beck freak, each day we watched the show together, which opened up a dialogue about politics that was not planned, but (always!) welcome in my home.  We come from VERY different backgrounds.  She has dyslexia, and dropped out of school.  I have 2 degrees in business.  She had a difficult home life, I did not,  Neither of us has a job at the moment.

The discussion spawned from me yelling at Pelosi on the TV, then yelling at Obama on the TV.  She asked me why I didn’t like Obama -

I had to pause and think how far back I needed to go into this discussion.  She is not a politics junkie like I am.  She also looks up to me (I am only 30, but (as she put it) I am like her smart older friend)  Instead of erupting in a scathing critique of Obamacare, and bringing up Van Jones and the like, I calmly explained about his “fundamental transformation of America” and that his agenda does not seem to run within the bounds or “constraints” of the Constitution.  She started asking me questions, and I was able to answer them competently (I think the blogosphere has caused me to shy away from discussion, because I am a perfectionist, and seem to spend more time fact checking than I do expressing my views)

The most important part of our discussion came when I asked her why she voted for Barack Obama.  She said that she “did it for meemaw” – because her grandmother (who grew up in Ohio) was always a Democrat.  I said – “But meemaw voted for who she wanted to vote for -”  she had never thought of that.

I was raised in a VERY republican home.  When I asked my grandfather (shortly before his death in 2007) who he voted for the first time he voted, he told me “My first vote was against FDR the first time he ran”  I recall the pictures of Ronald and Nancy Reagan, George H. W. Bush and Barbara, etc… on my grandparents refrigerator.  I went through a period of disillusionment with the GOP, and then discovered that I am in fact a Libertarian.

She listened intently to me and what I had to say.  I went on about the dollar, monetization of the debt, entitlements, and how freebies from the government are not at all free.  She stopped me and asked questions along the way, and I answered them to the best of my ability, and listed what I could not answer to look up (which we did afterward).  It was quite a refreshing contrast to the screaming matches I have had with friends who are liberal democrats.

All that said, sometimes it is better to ask why in a discussion than to beat them on points, facts, and correctness.  Many times they are looking for answers, not to be told that they are just flat out wrong.  Alot of them don’t know what they believe, and trust me, it is EASY to make sense of conservative beliefs and values to those who are democrats “just because”.



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7 Comments Leave a comment

That is an interesting story Civil Truth

kyle8 (Diary) Friday, October 16th at 8:34PM EST (link)

It’s kinda funny because I grew up in a democrat family, except for my father who was an agnostic, cynical, Korean war veteran. (if you ever saw Gran Torino, that described my dad exactly, in fact he used to drive a Gran Torino!)

But my dad’s cynicism did teach me one important thing, To distrust government, and people in power.

The rest of it came from my training as an economist (all my professors were from the Chicago school).

Luckily both my niece and nephew are, if anything, more conservative than me!

“Nothing works like freedom, Nothing succeeds like liberty”
Kyle

I think you meant to address this to cowgirl

civil truth (Diary) Saturday, October 17th at 1:44AM EST (link)

…since she, not me, was the author of this diary. I just recommended it.

The greatest evil…is conceived and ordered (moved, seconded, carried, and minuted) in clean, carpeted, warmed, and well-lighted offices, by quiet men with white collars and cut fingernails and smooth-shaven cheeks who do not need to raise their voice. Hence, naturally enough, my symbol for Hell is something like the bureaucracy of a police state or the offices of a thoroughly nasty business concern. -C.S. Lewis

http://www.gmsplace.com/

 
 

Agreed, Cowgirl...

randy streu (Diary) Friday, October 16th at 8:40PM EST (link)

some of my most satisfying political discussions have gone down the same way. Some of the most frustrating, too. Sometimes, logic just isn’t enough to counterract somebody who gets caught up in the moment.

Well done. My hunch is, many Obama voters are beginning to ask THEMSELVES why they voted for him; and they’ll need folks like you to articulate the question so they get the chance to hear just how silly their reasons sound.

agreed, the seeds of doubt are starting to germinate

mwmom Monday, October 19th at 9:47AM EST (link)

in the minds of previous loyal Obama supporters. Asking questions rather than spouting opinions can be very effective, if hard to remember to do given the depth of feelings involved. This is an especially good way to interact with the “millennials” (those born after 1980) because they are wary of opinion leaders and authority figureres but want to make their own decisions and get involved. Asking them questions about their beliefs, forcing them to articulate what they are and then holding them accountable with a little coaching can help them develop their own more informed decisions.

 
 

A timely reminder to keep perspective

civil truth (Diary) Saturday, October 17th at 1:46AM EST (link)

When we engage in poltiical debate on national issues, it can overshadow our activities of living

Changing one mind at a time, as you describe – it seems small, but you never know the long-term impact.

Thanks for the reminder.

The greatest evil…is conceived and ordered (moved, seconded, carried, and minuted) in clean, carpeted, warmed, and well-lighted offices, by quiet men with white collars and cut fingernails and smooth-shaven cheeks who do not need to raise their voice. Hence, naturally enough, my symbol for Hell is something like the bureaucracy of a police state or the offices of a thoroughly nasty business concern. -C.S. Lewis

http://www.gmsplace.com/

 

Nice Diary Cowgirl! recco'd! nt

nessa (Diary) Saturday, October 17th at 8:26PM EST (link)

“If you love wealth more than liberty, the tranquility of servitude better than the animating contest of freedom, depart from us in peace. We ask not your counsel nor your arms. Crouch down and lick the hand that feeds you. May your chains rest lightly upon you and may posterity forget that you were our countrymen.”—Samuel Adams

Contributor to Unified Patriots

teh twitter

 

Great post cowgirl!

diakrioi (Diary) Tuesday, October 20th at 11:50AM EST (link)

It’s easy to respond with derision and even anger when faced with some of the inane ideas of the left. But when we do so we may be closing the door to an opportunity to educate someone.

Your post reminded me of Patrick Leahy’s “Rules for Conservative Activists” that he wrote several months ago: http://michaelpatrickleahy.blogspot.com/2009/06/rules-for-conservative-radicals.html